Confused and hurt
I have been with my spouse for 5 years. We have a handful of kids together, a blended family. We live apart currently due to work; we each have half the kids. 3 of them are 18 (or over). The rest between 10 and 17. We came up with a set of rules and I have followed them to a T. I just found out my spouse has not and we now have a pregnant 14 year old. My spouse has been lying to me for months about our daughter’s whereabouts, the fact she is dating, and has been having sex and got pregnant. She has subsuqently choosen our daughter over our marriage and does not understand why I am upset. This particular daughter has run away from home 3 times in the last year and had to be put in a mental facility, which I have just found my spouse removed her from without talking to me. She is seeing therapists I specifically said I do not like because they don’t help. This isn’t the first time my spouse has lied to me about where our daughter is. Said daughter is also her biological daughter.
Would you forgive the spouse or run?
I believe if both of you have the custody of your kids and if this isn’t the first time she has lied…it’s time to really confront her. If she does not change, then it is not good for your kids…since you two will be fighting all the time and that’s not healthy. Consider confronting and give her a chance but if it doesn’t work then you might have to take some harsh steps…But there is also one more thing…maybe her daughter actually is going through something and needs to see a doctor for it…try talking about that too with your spouse please…try to understand her point too…
I have spoken to her about it. She has her kid, i have mine. Neither legally adopt the others. I have been pushing for the girl to get help. We have spoken about the girls issues, but she continues to take her to a crappy therapist who isnt helping. I have since learned that they are moving in with the boy. I have been told nothing of the boy. The kids have told me since the girl “announced” her pregnancy (i was just told, but they knew months ago and didnt tell anyone) that its even more all about the girl. The kids told me today they havent spoken to their mother at all. This, they tell me, isnt the first time she has ignored them.
If you feel that this situation is not correct for the kids and their wellbeing… you think you can approach it legally…like social services?