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3am Thoughts

Mujhe koi ladki apna kutta banayegi ,jo kahogi karunga.
Depression h bahut 

Adulting

I have always been a chubby person. I was always made fun of in school and college but i assumed that i wont have to go through the same at work/office because people would be much more mature there. But that was not the case. People here are so insensitive. They troll at me, make fun of me to the limit where i almost end up crying. It hurts so much. Why do people judge so much on the basis of looks? why do they care so much about my weight? I have an amazing personality and i just wish people would see me for that and not how much fat i have.

Work

Just a thought

I think it's difficult to relove yourself that to after such a long time and also when you are such a giving type of person.....it becomes difficult and also after so much of past events.....

Is it so??

Confusion

Sometimes, 
What didn't work for you
Really worked out for you
'TRUST THE PROCESS!!!'

My gf wants to go out with her friends like on a bike. And the people she wants to go with they usually cracks double meaning jokes and all. So when i am around them i feel uncomfortable by the way they are talking wd my girl. But my girl does nt have any problem wd that and she considers themselves as friend. So when she said she wants to go with them on bike idk i just don't like it. Like i just felt bad abt it. Idk why. 

So am i reacting much or its just normal to feel that way?? 

I suffer from Major Deepression, Anxiety, and ADHD. Sometimes I am not sure which  one is the culprit of my current distress. About seven months ago, my ex and I got into an argument that would end our three -year relationship to this day; I struggle with letting her go. We've had no contact for at least  six of those months. I blame myself for how it ended. I was impulsive. She brought up breaking up, so I agreed out of pain. Before this event, I had a depression flair that showed itself as me not wanting to go out and play video games. I pushed her away because I tend to isolate myself when feeling that way. I didn't take her on dates as I should have or show her my love correctly. I was in my head worried about work and bills etc. I truly loved her with all of my heart, but I need to let go now. I apologized and left the door open so she could walk back into my life. She has chosen to stay out. My heart is still shattered into a million pieces. I wanted to spend the rest of my life with this woman. Any average person would be able to walk away. I instead replay those events in my mind almost every day. I feel like she was my last chance at having the family I've always wanted to create. I am so alone in this apartment. All my friends are off living their lives tending to their families or working at odd hours. I have never been this alone in my life, and because of my actions, I ruined a relationship that could have been my last. How will I get out of this hole I've dug? I feel so stuck and lost. Besides work, I just come home and watch YouTube/tarot videos saying my ex will return. I think I am losing it. Is this normal? 

Lonely

I feel like I am useless nowadays everyone around me is doing something productive or thinking about future but I am doing nothing I don't know If I have any future I can't find a reason in my life.

Anxiety

My boyfriend of a year told me he wanted to break up because i dont eat healthy/ go to the gym and dont have sex with him enough and basically told me he wants a girlfriend he is proud to show off

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts