36 Questions That Lead To Love

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Sarvika Aggarwal

04 March 2024

6 Mins

Love is an unpredictable road that no one knows how to navigate. Especially for those who love someone but do not know if they do. However, there are some attractive innuendos that can surely help someone fall in love with you.

These innuendos are 36 general questions that you can try asking someone whom you wish to come with and see how it works out for you.

So let’s explore the 36 questions to fall in love.

The Science Behind the 36 Questions

The 36 questions that lead to love were made by researchers Arthur Aron, Elaine Aron, et al. They are made in such a way that they are divided into 3 sets, wherein the first set is a setting stage, which are beginner questions with less intimacy and vulnerability. However, as we move ahead, the questions become more open, honest, and raw, which will push the person in the right direction to answer the questions.

So even when Aron performed this research with a bunch of participants, in the end, they all locked eyes with each other for a good amount of time, which showed they had fallen in love with each other. However, in the original study, two strangers did this study without knowing each other and ended up falling in love and getting married. While it has a chance of happening 50-50, let’s see those 36 questions that lead to love.

36 Questions That Lead To Love: A Breakdown

There are 36 questions to make you fall in love, which are divided into 3 sets, each consisting of 12 questions. Let’s see what those questions are.

SET I

  1. Given the choice of anyone in the world, whom would you want as a dinner guest?
  2. Would you like to be famous? In what way?
  3. Before making a telephone call, do you ever rehearse what you are going to say? Why?
  4. What would constitute a “perfect” day for you?
  5. When did you last sing to yourself? To someone else?
  6. If you were able to live to the age of 90 and retain either the mind or body of a 30-year-old for the last 60 years of your life, which would you want?
  7. Do you have a secret hunch about how you will die?
  8. Name three things you and your partner appear to have in common.
  9. For what in your life do you feel most grateful?
  10. If you could change anything about the way you were raised, what would it be?
  11. Take four minutes and tell your partner your life story in as much detail as possible.
  12. If you could wake up tomorrow having gained any one quality or ability, what would it be?

SET II

  1. If a crystal ball could tell you the truth about yourself, your life, the future, or anything else, what would you want to know?
  2. Is there something that you’ve dreamed of doing for a long time? Why haven’t you done it?
  3. What is the greatest accomplishment of your life?
  4. What do you value most in a friendship?
  5. What is your most treasured memory?
  6. What is your most terrible memory?
  7. If you knew that in one year you would die suddenly, would you change anything about the way you are now living? Why?
  8. What does friendship mean to you?
  9. What roles do love and affection play in your life?
  10. Alternately, share something you consider a positive characteristic of your partner. Share a total of five items.
  11. How close and warm is your family? Do you feel your childhood was happier than most other people’s?
  12. How do you feel about your relationship with your mother?

SET III

  1. Make three true “we” statements each. For instance, “We are both in this room feeling … “
  2. Complete this sentence: “I wish I had someone with whom I could share … “
  3. If you were going to become a close friend with your partner, please share what would be important for him or her to know.
  4. Tell your partner what you like about them; be very honest this time, saying things that you might not say to someone you’ve just met.
  5. Share with your partner an embarrassing moment in your life.
  6. When did you last cry in front of another person? By yourself?
  7. Tell your partner something that you like about them already.
  8. What, if anything, is too serious to be joked about?
  9. If you were to die this evening with no opportunity to communicate with anyone, what would you most regret not having told someone? Why haven’t you told them yet?
  10. Your house, containing everything you own, catches fire. After saving your loved ones and pets, you have time to safely make a final dash to save any one item. What would it be? Why?
  11. Of all the people in your family, whose death would you find most disturbing? Why?
  12. Share a personal problem and ask your partner’s advice on how he or she might handle it. Also, ask your partner to reflect back to you how you seem to be feeling about the problem you have chosen.

Other Ways to Build Intimacy

While these questions seem to do their work and help someone you love or know fall in love with you, there are other ways to build intimacy as well. Let's have a look:

  1. Go for late night walks
  2. Try new activities with each other
  3. Join a dancing/cooking class that piques both of your interests
  4. Go on trips every 2-3 months to new places
  5. Make meals together
  6. Take part in understanding what makes the other person happy
  7. Trying each other’s hobbies
  8. Setting new goals to achieve with each other
  9. Try couples therapy to build a stronger bond
  10. Surprise each other

How Can Now&Me Help?

If you are in a state of confusion about how to fall in love or find the perfect partner for yourself, Now&Me is here to help. You can sign up on this platform and share your thoughts and feelings without any filters with relationship experts.

Not only this but you can even become a part of the Now&Me community and talk to like-minded people about the things that seem to bother you. Become a part of the Now&Me family by downloading the app and understanding ways to connect with people seamlessly.

Sources

Now&Me articles are written by experienced mental health contributors and are purely based on scientific research and evidence-based practices, which are thoroughly reviewed by experts, including therapists and psychologists with various specialties, to ensure accuracy and alignment with current industry standards.

However, it is important to note that the information provided is not a substitute for professional medical advice, diagnosis, or treatment. Individual circumstances vary, and it is advisable to consult with a qualified mental health professional for personalized advice and guidance.

FAQs

There is always a 50-50 chance when it comes to psychological studies; however, as said by the researchers who did this study, it does help.

To maintain the flow of the conversation, it is better to ask all the questions in one set at once and then take breaks for better understanding and flow.

It is mostly appropriate for romantic relationships.

You do not have to answer a question that makes you uncomfortable.

It does play a huge role in fixing relationships so you can give it a try with your partner.

When you are not sure about the person in front of you or know that you do not want to be associated with them, it is best to avoid these 36 questions.

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