Are there any happy endings? I just want to vent if anyone wants to listen. 

Listen there are no happy endings.. if the thing ends happily na.. then it doesn't hold any value in our hearts.. sad endings are the gems of all

of course there are but, there will always be a problem on the way but that doesnt mean that ur ending is not happy

3am Thoughts

Hi there,
Every ending is a new beginning, Trust it.

Affirmations

Today i m feeling so restless .. bcoz i am not able to recognise my self ..where is my smile😔 i m becoming someone different n i m not lyking it...

Stress

Following up on my last post, I feel a tiny bit better. I'm trying to keep my head straight, taking a deep breath, so hopefully I can get back to being happy and living normally again. :)
The whole idea of this sort of thing happening to me at the age of 24 is funny, yet painful at the same time. I feel pretty baffled. If it was 10 years ago, I wouldn't be as surprised, but this is some weird shit.

Hustle

ENERGY is contagious…. either you AFFECT people or INFECT people. 

So, I haven't posted on here since February and its because I've been feeling a little better. I don't think I have though. I just kind of felt empty and worked so much to mask the pain I was feeling. But recently I've been feeling like a huge screw up. It just feels like I am always messing something up. And I completely hate myself. People tell me to stop trying to be perfect and stop being negative and isolated but its just too hard. I mean when you spend 22 years of your life hating every aspect of yourself how can you change that? 22 years of the same behavior needs to change. I mean is that even possible? The days that I work I feel okay. But the days that I'm off I feel horrible. It takes me forever to get out of bed, if I even make it that far. I usually just stay in bed till the next day I have to work. My dad gets mad at me for "sleeping" all the time. I literally tell him I'm not sleep I just want to be alone in my room. Its nice and cold and no sun light comes in. I love it. As soon as I get up to try and interact with my family I instantly get irritated. Its so hard. I don't know what's wrong with me. I just wanna stay alone and unbothered. But when I do I feel lonely? But I don't wanna interact with the people in my house? I really wish I could figure out what was wrong with me. Thanks for listening to my rant if anyone read this. (: 

i dont even know how to feel anymore. i recentl found out i have ocd and its been eating me up ever since. ocd is something ive struggled with ever since i was a kid and i never knew what it was, always thinking it was a part of my imagination and that it would get better when it only got worse. im now 15 and i can sadly say that up until this age ive never had anybody to talk to about my struggles, always locking it all up inside me and the internet being my only source of comfort.

its just that ive never thought myself worthy of anyhting, always being selfless and putting other peoples needs before mine, caring way too much about what they think, about what they feel.
but i really want to get some sort of treatment for this, because i think im slowly losing it, and funnily enough everytime i try to open up about my struggles to someone, whatever i say always gets disregarded and i end up being called selfish.

i really dont want to worry anyone about this but i just thought opening up about this might help ease my worries just a bit :)

Mental Health

Concept: a mermaid who collects human artifacts, but, like, exclusively objects that humans have dramatically cast into the sea in moments of high emotion, catharsis, or personal revelation. Each item is carefully mounted above a little index card that outlines the circumstances of its hurling in terse, clinical prose.


Happy

I just have no will to live anymore. I lost my faith in everything. Its killing me from the inside out. Its like there no purpose for our lives. What is like to be happy or to smile. Its been a long time. Why am i so sad that i just dont know i really dont know why i just cant smile anymore , i can no longer look to the people in the eyes, its scars me like am feeling so lonely even tho i have friends around me, it just feels so lonely. They be laughing all day long, and am just there wondering how can they be so happy, like how they can do it and i just cant. Why am i so fucking down like ihate myself so much, that i end up crying everyday in my bad like a babby. Why is it so hard for me to share my feelings? Maybe cz no would ever care, no one will really understands me. I can't concentrate in my classes which it leads for me to fail my classes. Why is it so hard for people to notice that am not really okay tho my answer to "how  are you " is always "fine". Why i can know when people aren't really good. Why i can notice it fast while everyone arround me cant. Why whenever someone is sad i just worry alot about thm and not giving myself any kind to attention. Why i care about people more thn i care about myself. I just don't know what to do anymore. Am really lost. Am just so sad that i totally forgot i last time i was happy.I had a bad childhood, i never had a friend for my first 15 years. I was bullied, i used to be a joke for everyone, and my parents didn't do anything about it. And i just don't blame thm for that cz they are unconscious. All they cared about was my grades. And cz of that am the person i am now. If everything was different for me would i be a different person now? If yes thn who i really am?
Am afraid to commit suicide , not cz there is a hell and heaven but cz there is nothing after death, i just want to find my happiness, i just want to find something i am really good at, i just want to live like everyone else, its killing me. I just cant live and i cant die. Its the worst feeling. I just want someone to be next to me, believe in me, to help me get threw all this, i just cant find anyone who would really care for me. I lost my faith.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts