Any Westworld, Stranger things, Game of thrones, Vikings, Peaky Blinders,,, fan here? 

Life

When killing them with kindness doesn't work, try a hockey stick.

P.S- Results may vary.

Books

Fucked

ADHD

I lost my bsf bc of my stupidity and jealousy I hung out wit her ex bc she was ghostin me and she was in her ghost era I get tha but she was hangin out wit this girl who I never rlly liked bc she always made me feel left out in our group she is cool tho I don’t have nun against her it’s js that and like ik if I ever made my bsf choose her or me she would of choose her so I hung out wit my bsf ex and posted it I knew tha if I did tha she would finally txt me and she did the plan worked exept we stopped being friends and I get that it’s js I don’t know what to do without her I’m way to attached 

Friends

Dancing With My Deepest Dark Desires

Lonely

"YES IT IS I DONT KNOW IF ANYONES EVER TOLD YOU THIS BUT UR PARTNER HAS FEELINGS AND WHEN THEY CARE....UR GONNA KNOW.  IM NOT LIKE UR OTHER GF OBVIOUSLY CUZ I CARE WHAT HAPPENS TO YOU AND I WANNA HELP YOU AND PROTECT YOU SO DONT ARGUE WITH ME LOVE" My gf said this to me....I'm crying rn

Love

RM keep appearing in my dreams🤦. TBH Sometimes it's feel real so I don't want to wake up.😂

Happy

Depression. A feeling most of us here know too well. That deep paralysing pain in your chest. The one that reduces you to an absolute nothing. The one that makes you want to be in the void and departed from this reality you exist in, however this feeling I know too well, I do know for a fact for any single living being within this existence that things change with time and so will this, better or worse I have yet to find out. Change along with time are the 2 constants in your life that you can always rely on despite the outcomes. You know it is coming and you know you need to adapt or as they say die. So say what you will, do as you please and fuck everything up if that is your desire, just make sure you can go to sleep that very night at peace with the decisions you've made that day whether sober, drunk or high. Stick to your decisions, reconcile the ones that led you into darkness and be better thereafter. Improving. Congratulate yourself on the good outcomes. Shit happens, always will, only thing that you control is how you react to shit and nothing else. Your character seen by others. Your character valued by yourself! Be proud and if you aren't then no need to state the obvious, however I WILL. YOU NEED TO MAKE A CHANGE. you know what to change, just a matter of doing the DAMN thing. Not easy, then again nothing really worth something to you is easy. Put it in lazy terms, a bottle of whiskey vs the price of a weeks healthy food. You may be fortunate enough to have both and if you do, cudos to you. One of my goals in life is simply just to have atleast 3 meals a day. One day that will come to fruition but for now, keep hustling, make your bread, keep pushing because as I said, one day things will change. Things will be within different circumstances whether they are things you can change or not, doesn't matter. Things change and so will you, so keep with that flow and grow. You cannot control every aspect of your life and most of your life well, you end up reacting to events around you rather than creating each event, some you will create, others will be unexpected. Like I said, how you react is what YOU have control over. So simply put for any sense of a military mind, get up, make up your fucking bed and pursue the day, because each little thing or factor in your life plays a part and does MATTER. Otherwise keep droning on if that's what pleases you and die as a statistic on some spreadsheet, either way you live once, you know this, therefore make it FUCKING count. You don't get a 2nd try. This is it. This is your try. Your first and only run you will ever know. You know your fuck ups, your mistakes, your faults better than anyone else will ever know. So make a choice and do better. The thing is with feeling the way you are, you tend to know how to get out of that slump logically but the emotional hold back or lack of drive due to this feeling prevents us from pursuing the healthier path mentally and emotionally. You want physical, go for a fucking run until you get fit enough for a runners high. Better than taking acid swimming in a lake and that I promise as one whom has been on both sides of that fence. The reality we live in is easier to replace things than fix them. Extremely sad and fucked up in all honesty. Our lack of capacity to mend, to fix has been diminished and accepted as a societal norm nowadays rather than to put effort, time, sweat and tears into something we can be proud of. Yet we would rather throw away and replace. That mentality sadly attaches to how you see relationships, jobs, family, hell anything as it conforms you to think a certain way and accept it as okay. You can sleep at night despite knowing at the back of your mind, you've could've done more and you could've done better. So in essence. Learn from your mistakes, get hard or get fucked and you do deserve better. You need to believe this for the rest to fall in place otherwise you shall remain your own worst enemy till the end of your existence. So take care, fuck Covid and I wish you all nothing but the best in your lives ahead, no wars, no poverty, no loss of life, just a peaceful existence along with a painless death one day. Give your all and if you are to pass this day, make sure it is a day you are proud to pass on. Make each day a day you are proud to leave this world behind for others. Never give anything than your less and help others whenever you can because one day you will hope someone will do the same for you with no strings attached, just out of the purity of what heart they have left. I wish you a peaceful and wealthy yet healthy jouney ahead and that whatever problems you may encounter along the way that you overcome them with discipline and come out for the better at the end of it. Not saying you need to be perfect, NO ONE ever is. No such thing exists, just be happy with yourself, your choices and your existence. Keep adapting, keep growing and never stop pushing, never give up. Just keep pushing. You will survive and you will thrive with this drive for life. Just have to win that war in your mind first before the rest falls in place for you. Just hold on, keep on holding and pushing for more. 4:23 AM here by me now, hopefully you're making better decisions than I at this hour. Goodnight, goodday to any of you out there and rest well or have an exceptionally productive day.

3am Thoughts

Lately I just started avoiding people. Because people don't understand. I may sound crazy but now been sad depressed make people angry they ask why are you like this. Like if we wanted to enjoy our life in this blackhole

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts