And finally I got discharged from hospital after being there for 4 days with all that injections and continue saline bottle 🤧 yeah but I've to take care of my health now onwards 🤕

Lmao yes😢 found out there was severe infection in my blood and stomach 😢

Adulting

 I have covid and it feels like im being dragged through hell and back.

COVID-19

Covid has ruined many lives.
I don't even know how to live my life anymore
I miss my wife
She died with our unborn baby.
I never wanted to do this alone , I am a single dad to our son he's 5
Don't know how to live anymore and how to help him anymore.

Depression

Help the sick, train the weak and support the vulnerable, and most importantly never forget that we will leave the stage one day.

Only legacy will remain.

Have a wonderful and blessed day.

Affirmations

My dad is in critical condition right now. Both mom and dad are admitted in the hospital and my elder sister is quarantined. my little brother is 2 years old and he is with me . i'm feeling very anxious. i feel hopeless right now. whenever i try to talk to someone i cry. I'm so scared for my dad. His oxygen level is dropping even after giving him oxygen and they might have to take him to ICU. its too much for me to process.

Sometimes i feel covid will kill me afterwards Brain stroke will First.

Life

I lost my father due to Covid 19 in April 2021. I was there with him in COVID ward for every minute for 13 days. He was on oxigen support (oxigen mask) On the 14th day at 3:30 AM his oxigen seturation was 55-65 so I called ward boys and doctors to bring Bipep machine as was advised by the attending doctor on previous night. My father was unwilling to apply bipep machine, so I gave it in writing that it will be my responsibility if anything happens if Bipep machine was not applied. Then I asked them to let me try to convince my father to apply bipep machine. I convinced my father and the bipep machine was applied on and of for 2-3 times, but finally detached as my father was not willing. The wardboy took 10 minutes to shut off the bipep machine, during that time I stand nearby my father, he was breathing on normal Oxigen mask as far as I remember. Then as soon as the wardboy finally switched off the bipep machine I sat back on a chair just 5 feet away my father, and unknowingly got a nap of few seconds, as I was in sleep deprivation for almost 12 days. As soon as I opened my eyes I saw that my father was not breathing. I called the wardboy and doctor, they gave may father emergency CPR but finally declared dead by seeing straight ECG at 5:45 AM. I saw my father for almost above 45 minutes. Checked his eyes and placed my years on his chest. After that he was placed in the mortuary and taken back for funeral at around 2:00 PM. I was told at that time that I have to see him there last time and they won't open the body at funeral. There was nobody with me, So I had to make my mind that I have to perform his last rites with his covered boby and face. When we reached at funeral place, only my maternal uncle and his two sons came. Nobody asked me to open my father's face neither it was allowed due to Corona Protocol, neither it came to my mind because I had already made my mind as I was told so, and at the time of performing last rites I became emotionally numb. Everything was over then.

After few days of coming home, sone doubts and guilts came to my mind such as- 
1. Why did I naped(slept)? Was there any mistake in his normal Oxigen supply which I missed due nap or unknowingly?
2. Why it not came to my mind to open my father's face at last time? Was there any possibility of his being alive at that time? (Although he was there at mortuary for 6-8 hours and I just saw him there dead few minutes earlier)

Due to above thoughts I feel very guilty. I just wanted to know that whether my doubts are rational?
And whether I acted Right in those circumstances? 
Please advise!!!

Covid19

Lonely

I feel so anxious. The pandemic is making it hard for me to stay positive. Also idk why, I’m having retrospective jealousy. I’m unable to digest my husband’s past. It’s been 2 years and we’re still fighting about the past. I don’t know what to do. I feel there’s no ray of hope. 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts