3am Thoughts

Hi all I've already posted a problem I've been facing in recent times. A guy who was friendly with me for few months proposed me and i rejected his proposal and he got married to someone i got engaged after hearing that he started torturing by telling how can u accept another guy and not me. He started blackmailing with morphing photos and i ignored. I shared about this in my last post and few good souls replied and suggested that i should tell my boyfriend. My boyfriend talked to him and we thought that the prob was over. But he called me again and started bitching me through sms. I don't know what kind of person he is. He got Married but still torturing me . Kindly Suggest me what to do. Should i ignore him or what

Depression

Think outside the box 📦 

I am 23, and I feel my my life wasted or eh I never had a life. It's not like I lost someone but yeah I never had anyone. I want to start a new life and yeah not from today but from childhood. Yes I don't want to live but can't die either. Coz Life isn't a wish granting factory as I always wished since teenage that I don't want to live but it's oops I came this far (unfortunately) and yes without a life just a survival. 
Why should I live? Just coz two people gave me birth I should not do disappoint them? Woah!! yeah good reason. What about my disappointment from life ha? 
And uk what? I never had a talk with anyone irl coz I never felt connection with anyone or even if I did I didn't get understood and yeah with few I did want to but uk na disappointment :) It's not about relationship tho. 

Chalo aaj ki katha samapt. 
If someone is reading this, aap ka din shubh rahe! 🤗

Life

Did you ever stop and think to ask the monster under your bed what he's hiding from?

Baaatein zaroori hai,
Tera milna bhi zaroori
Mene mita deni
Ye jo teri meri doorie

Crush

How do you comfort someone online?

You can either suffer the pain of discipline or the pain of regret. 

 

Idk what am I going to say
Like I feel I'm always a burden on everyone. I make a first move for any relation but can't maintain it for more than a week and then ask myself, Am I that bad..Actually I am. Because ,of me my mom got 2 panic attacks (nearly stroke) because of my lying. Though I pretend I'm adult now and can take care of myself and am all fine..there's nothing like that. Just a fool. I ask help first and then end up being more disturbed ,because of my behavior only. I'm a baddest friend you can ever expect. Like I'm not worth anything. Though friends are meant to enjoy every moment of life, I'd only make things more worse. I'm always a trouble. Everytime I go ,even to a nearby market, my mom always worries for me, she asks me to drive slow. And I do exactly the opposite...At the top most speed.
Barely a day in a month that I don't experience what death feels like. Driving recklessly and always on the boundary to meet with an accident..But it's my wish too. I feel so so much attracted towards alcohol and cigarettes and even smthg else too. Though I'd done it but I feel more need of it. I know if my parents got to know..I'm dead. Basically I don't have anyone to talk with..but the reason is ME. I'm a total flopp

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