We all deserve someone who likes the lame, messy and unfiltered version of us

Yes 💯 but sometimes we try NOT to messy, lame jus so that we r not judged

And that's actually your true self isnt it ?

Validation is most toxic thing ever in your life remember that.

Somebody tell me when we constantly keep facing people who weaken our believe in true love these days. so should we give up the hope to find a innocent heart person and start fucking around like everyone does or should we keep that hope alive and get hurt again and again?

3am Thoughts

You deserve someone who will be gentle with you and your feelings.

Love

sometimes i dream about you wanting me back in your life again. then i hesitate, knowing the pain i might endure again, the kind of pain that can't be easily forgotten or cured by a simple pill. thinking that i should have trusted my gut back then not to let you in my life. i asked myself what have i gotten myself into. i am so broken by you. you should have said something simple for not wanting to be with me, like me being ugly, or that you have other priorities in life and that i was not one of them. but the reason you gave me was so vague that my brain cannot understand the logic behind it. i am sooo confused that it has bothered me a great deal, adding to the stress i have been enduring at work. i never did anything wrong to you. i was a loving and caring person. what more can you want? what more are you looking for? what more do you want from me?  i gave you my everything, my whole world. wasn't that enough for you? what else do you want from me. you should just have said that there was another person for you. you were my first, and i was your first. when i said that i liked you, you may not have understood the great big leap of faith i had to do back then in order to say those words to you. it was hard for me, but i managed to say those things just to relieve the pressure off my chest, and you accepted those feelings, you reciprocated them, and you accepted me for who i am. why now? what happened? what did i do wrong? what did i lack? the thoughts in my head are running like fire, it's spreading all over me, consuming me. i ask God now why you and I had to meet just to cause me such a great deal of pain. why is the world so cruel. why? :'( 

Breakup

Until next time .

I loved you N. Don't know if i still have the same hence put past tense. And i Don't think u never realized about this.
I never liked you during the initial years. You were so annoying type of a kind for me. Later when we get to know each other more, idk how and when but i felt something for u. Something started to pull me into you always. I didn't want it to grow in my mind so i tried telling myself this is rubb_ish. But this never faded. First i thought it might be just infatuation. But why does it never leaves? It should be more than 2 years i felt this for u. I still couldn't figure out what I'm having for u. I couldn't understand that exact feeling. But i didn't want that to develop into a relationship bcz i don't think it would work. We are sooo different in various things. So i guess we won't get along. And also maybe i feel inferior to you in certain things. Is that ego? Idk. But I'm not that kind of person. I never said anything about this to you. Because I'm just scared. What would u think. If u never had any feelings for me it would be so awkward to talk to u again. But at certain times while seeing u i just gets a gut feeling that u liked me too. Maybe u r also thinking the same way I think? Like this won't do any good? Anyway Let things be like we are friends so that i can talk to u freely. I have been trying to get over you for almost 2 years. I could never. Whever i see u i gets excited. My heart pounds. Why the he_ll are u still in my mind. Just go away. I think you are getting into a relationship now. Saw some posts on insta. It hurt me a very little, not a big thing. Not sure about things but feel like u r not into it. None of my business! I'm still trying to get through this. Not like it's the only things in my mind but it pops up whenever i see something related to u.
I don't hate u.(bcz i don't want to say i still love u) Hope i won't see u anytime soon.

How to get rid of one's memories?

Mental Wellbeing

Just something random i worte lol (idk why there's a trigger warning i can't take it off)

how you’ve been ?
i'm still the same as back then
loving you is all that i can
and i see you in all those faces 
you’ve left too many traces
and i hate everything about me 
whenever i'm with someone else
cuz I’ll never feel the same with them 
nothing will go back to how it used to be
cuz there won’t be more of you and me

how you’ve been?
i'm still the same as back then
i can’t put a period nor an end

we were ruined by insecurities and fear
but i realized that I’d rather bleed to death with you 
then not to have you near 
so if you still want 
we can do everything we planned
we can escape and withstand

but nothing is all it meant

right?


Poetry

I'm not cold hearted by any means, though I'd wish to be. It's just that I decided who to share my fire with, and not everyone is worth burning for 😏

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts