Waking up for me is a task. My mind keeps rewinding all the bad decisions I have taken and bad memories. I just dont wanna wakeup. What's wrong with me. I miss the old me.

Social Anxiety

How do you know that you are in love

Love

How to be more talkative i am an introvert and I hate that i don't get what to speak to people?

Intro

Hy I am an engineering student ... after completion of my tenth I did diploma in Civil engineering...everything is OK until then on my 3 sem I met a girl my junior on fb we started chatting each other from then upto now 4 years relationship I really and with full heart loved here but in relationship some fights are common due to my overcareness we make fights every day ....from last month but she don't know how much I love her on Nov 2 a incident takes place she left me on that day onwards I am suffering a lot I went to die because she is only girl who can understand me .. I was in depression the main problem is I was unable to sleep thinking about her 24 hours and the pain in my heart is very too much ...really the pain and the day when she left me that was coming dream in night daily so I can't sleep peacefully 😔 I have support of my friends parents but the pain is killing me day by day with dreams

3am Thoughts

Luck is when preparation meets opportunity.

Life

hi, I am struggling with my own self, I have been criticized a lot for not doing things rightly, and for a lot more things, and because of that 
I every time need opinions of others about me,  
I cannot take control or do anything that I want in my life, and I know it is because of how I think or how I process it, but it is tough, IDK why but I always want opinions of people who criticized me and i really don't know how to deal with the problem, i have identified the problem but i cannot execute it , 
also because of that i do not have my opinions about anything, i just say what they say, i don't know what is with me!!
if anyone could relate please help!!
ps: i am using this for the first time

Mental Illness

I've always been an emotional person all my life. Now suddenly i dont know y i feel so empty.
Things that should make me cry, are not making me feel anything.
Being the eldest daughter of the family, i've always done too many sacrifices for my sisters
The middle one has always been very rude towards me but i never took her words seriously. 
Being 21 years old, she started to talk about property distribution before other people who used to dislike us before but pretend that they r  more than 'family' today
Idk y this hurt me so much
She always said that my parents will give her everything that everything belongs to her only.
My father has always been very partial to her ever since i did not do well in my grade 11.
I took the exams the second time and passed with flying colours
The year i was repeating the class, my father treated me as if i was a failure
My mother was the only one from my family who supported me along with my then boyfriend now fiancé.
After my success in grade11 and grade13 i expected that this will stop but unfortunately it did not.
My father is still very much partial towards my sister
I feel like an outsider in my own house
Because of this, i started to stay in my room alone
I prevent myself from talking to anyone
I confided in my ex bestfriend who ultimately broke my trust
Except my fiancé, i have no one
I feel trapped, i feel so lonely.
MRU is in confinement again and this is affecting me a lot
I want to leave this toxic environment but i am unable to 🥺

Exhausted

inside broken 

Anxiety

Books on guide to -how to meditate better .

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts