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To be honest, I don’t know how to feel, this year I only asked my dad once to take me to school to pick stuff up and I needed to go to school today to pick up more stuff so in total TWO only TWO times. He just goes off saying how he is busy and can’t always take me and saying do you see how busy I am since he was getting a lot of phone calls and I just sat there quietly, and the thing is I don’t like leaving my house it’s usually my older sister that always asks my dad to take her and he said to me…like say it to her she is the one that always asks you to take her to work, friends house, to pick school stuff, like say it to her too she is the one that needs to hear those stuff, not me. Oh and then after I picked up the stuff for my ceramics class I started painting the hard clay and I was fixing my platter and my sister decides to make a small cup bc I had extra clay, I didn’t see a problem with that so I didn’t mind. Until my mom came and was like oh I’ll record while both of you continue to do what you are doing like she only starting recording because my sister decided to make a cup because not one time did my mom ever thought of taking a picture or video of me when I did it and she was always present when I would work on my piece. And she proceeds to compliment her and how good it looks when she never complemented me. It’s always the little things that hurt me the most. Like I get that she is better but still, all they are doing is making me hate my sister more every day by fucking giving her attention, compliments on both looks and grades, and by comparing me to her…do they even know how much they are hurting me. It hurts, it’s their fault I am jealous of her and all of this hatred I am feeling towards my sister is because of them. I am tired of being here…I really don’t want to be here, it hilarious why they ask me why I am in my room all the time. I just feel so unwanted, I feel lonly here…

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