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This may sound silly but this happens to me always and all this frustration has started building up within me.
So my parents came back from somewhere out,and sat in the couch. I asked them with the most polite tone if they washed their hands(because of this covid scare) . My mom yelled at me so bad I started crying. She said “you don’t have to tell me this. I am responsible enough. Tired of this always wash your hands” Then she started blaming me for things I never did while I was still crying. She never consoled me and the worst thing is dad also joined. When I started crying they got irritated but never consoled never apologised.
So the thing is my mom is tensed about something else. She is always tensed and puts all her anger on me. A few moments later my older brother came, she spoke to him with such politeness. This happens to me everyday. My brother and mom yell at me for no reason, they put their anger on something else on me. My dad never loves me he never speaks unless there’s some work
and always fills my mother’s ears against me. I’m like the punching bag of the house. I am 21 years old. I wish I get married to a good human being who will never use me as a punching bag and defend me in front of others. I have two other siblings they are married and they don’t care about me or anyone else at home.
Also I don’t trust boys because I liked this guy and he used me emotionally for 4 years because he was aware of my feelings. We never dated though. He used to tell me I love yous and all that. But he was actually dating many people. He always insulted me and lied to me. I went no contact with him a year back,fed up of everything.
And I have no real friends all use me. Except one, but I think over the year even she’ll end up like them. Hope not.
In the end I just want to say I don’t want to become like my mother, but I fear I might.

2 replies

Heyyyy babygirl remember you’re not alone in this. Sometimes it happens that we starve for our parents love but they never succeed to give us because the past trauma, incidents that happened to them they can never forget them. You have to be happy by yourself don’t wait or expect someone to give you love or defeat you in front of others you’re strong in your own you don’t need anyone just try to be the best version of yourself. Don’t talk or argue too much in your family until it’s necessary. Try to give love to the people around yourself as much as you can, start reading some books, do 30 mins of meditation everyday focus on your studies be something that your future will thank you. Remember you’re worthy best of luck


Thank you so much, I appreciate your words♥️


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