Someone Please help me understand myself, idk who I am anymore. I'm scared, and tired. I just want to sleep and never wake up, but I don't know why I wish for this. Why do I think this way? Am I broken? Does everyone think this way?

At some point of life we all feels something like that I guess and I advise you to wait and let this time pass till then do whatever makes you occupied like some creative things even if you are not in a mood, try and be invested in something or other things. Keep going 

Anxiety

It will get better, right?

Confusion

I go and come back for i not know what i want. Perhaps waiting to leave so i dont come back. And i will be gone and the universe wouldnt care. 

3am Thoughts

The one time I open up, the one time I decide to be vulnerable, I get played. Guess what I will never fricking do again. 

Breakup

Nothing gets better right?

Depression

Surviving by holding the light of others.

Life

Live alone
Bury self to work
Eat instant noodles
Drown self in a bathtub
Stream nonstop
Sleep whenever wanted
Drain energy
Di3

Ughhhhhhh......man. Taking it one day at a time. Switching back and forth, multiple times a day, from wanting to live and try to wanting to give up because what's really the point. I don't think people understand just how much living to have "fun" means nothing. There are people in the world who are abused everyday, and the people who aren't abused as much or have better mental health or are in better situations should want to help them. Of course we want and need fun so we won't drown in the darkness but people forget there's more to life than fun. Yall really need to help others, If you don't really want to genuinely better the life's of other people who NEED it, then your selfish. And selfishness is evil and I can't even wrap my brain around the want to live solely for the purpose to have fun.

I’m not feeling well at all. 
I don’t get taken seriously enough for people to care about my mental health.
Maybe I’m just lazy and don’t want to work but I’m dreading school I don’t want to get out of bed it’s becoming hard for me.
I might go back to trying to starve myself to death like I tried in lockdown.
I’m kinda jealous of my friends cause whilst I’ve been suffering for years I’ve never gotten help I’m unable to get diagnosed, meanwhile they only been suffering a month and got help.
Living is getting hard. I hate myself I want to disappear.
I don’t deserve to have friends.
I’m going insane. I don’t know it’s like I can’t control myself anymore I want to hurt someone. 
I’ll never amount to anything.
I’m so tired of people not taking me seriously always judging me as if I’m annoying them when really I’m not even talking to them.


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