So, I decided to share what’s on my mind, because for the last couple of days, I’ve been down and depressed.
Without sharing too much about myself, I’m a 24 year old male. My hobbies include, jogging, basketball, hanging with friends and gaming. I have a bachelor’s degree in Tourism, and I will be graduating a Master’s program in Marketing very soon. I live with my parents which isn’t the best thing but I did have a day job until recently. I got laid off because the company was going under, but I did make money and will continue to do that. Therefore, I’ve been helping my parents with bills, and whenever I buy something for myself, I rely on my own wallet. I’m not from the US, and in my country it’s kind of common to live like this until you find a place to live, if you’re gonna be studying in the same city you’re from, which I am and have. Hopefully now that my old job is in the past, I can focus on building a career in digital marketing.
Anyway, I’ve been feeling very badly, because things around me are changing. I have an older sister and two nephews that I love so much, but Me and her stopped being close like we used to be about 2-3 years ago. She just has a lot on her plate with her own family. At the same time my closest friends are branching of to their own interests, so I feel less connected to them. Their parents have extra apartments, so they don’t have to worry about paying rent when they move out. I don’t have the same luck.
Now, I need to clarify something. My family isn’t the most financially stable. Around 10-15 years ago when I was a kid, we had money problems. We couldn’t afford all the things a normal family could, but my parents fought through the trenches to raise me and I have come to addopt the same type of mentality. I don’t need all that much to live a good life, but I do want to start a family of my own in the future and make sure they have what they need. But the thing is, I feel lonely. I’m not good with girls, I’ve tried getting a girlfriend since my highschool years, but no such luck. I’m looking for something serious, but I’m a little shy and reserved. At the same time, I have plenty of female friends too, so I think I’m a good listener. I guess I’m just not interesting enough for a girl, but I can’t just pretend to be someone else. I have tried that in highschool, and no, it didn’t work, In fact, it brought me a lot of pain and clarity. I just feel, that by the time I reach my 30s, I have to have some goals achieved so I can forge my path the way I want to.
And here’s where things get crazy. Recently, I watched a TV show that my friends recommended a lot. It did come out at the beginning of the year. I really enjoyed it, but in the process I developed a celebrity crush on a certain actress. Now, I’ve had celeb crushes in the past but I never put much thought into them. And this actress is someone I’ve seen in other movies as well, and I just liked her work. But now, she found her way into my mind, and I just cannot get her out of my head. Now I know that celeb crushes are crazy and pointless, because she doesn’t know I exist, plus she’s famous and she’s a bit older (in her early 30s), and not single. So, all the reasons in the universe for this fantasy of mine to not work are in play, but still I cannot stop thinking about her and it’s driving me crazy! Combine that with all the other things I just talked about, and I just feel like a I want to just disappear. Not kill myself, nothing like that. Just have it be something like in Avengers where I snap my fingers and I just turn to dust and dissappear. I’ve tried digging into my hobbies, but no ammount of exercise or gaming, or socializing can help me anymore. I’ve even thought about seeking professional help, I’m dead serious!
So that’s it. I value my privacy, so I have given some vague info, but those of you who are observant will know who I’m talking about in the last paragraph, I just didn’t feel like sharing, cause I’m a bit embarassed! :D If you have any thoughts or advice, let me know! Thanks for reading!😃
Hi, hopefully I will…
Thank you very much for that. That’s the thing, I already am doing those things, but sometimes it feels I’m back at square one. And that last thing surprised the hell out of me, because I’ve never had this sort of experience with any celebrity crush I’ve had before. And I’ve had a lot since I was a kid. :D :D
Yeah, and hopefuly I’ll meet her before I get old and grouchy. 😂
Thank you.
Even I ve a crush on her :p.
Dont worry about it bud, you ll get over it soon.
Haha, that actually made me feel a tiny bit better! Thanks, I hope so! :)
Yeah man, who wouldnt have a crush on her ? ;)
On a serious note, these crushes have been transient for me, im sure you ll get over it.
I like to think so, it just unexpectedly lined up with all my other life dilemmas, and it had an impact on me, that I didn’t expect.
It happens, if it makes you feel better, i had a crush on a teacher in highschool, the entire class knew about and they made it soo obvious that after a certain point even the teacher knew about. But then i got over it the next year
That’s the thing. I’ve had crushes in the past. Celebrity and on normal girls my age. :D But this one got a little crazy!
I guess we should make a common list of all of our celebrity crushes someday haha
Maybe.
Dude, I literally have a crush on 7 celebrity boys belong to the same band. I literally dream as if am married to them, I met them or I make up some stories in my head…but its all just fantasies you know. Yet I admire them,respect them and want them to be happy and love someone they care about…I wish all the happiness and success for them. There are some fans who get hurt if their celebrity crush is with someone else, but if you know the line between somethings then everything will be normal. A line between your fantasies and the reality, if you get clear about it then you will be very happy. Focus on your work, digital marketing or find a new hobby.
ITS OKAY!!! Be happy…
