Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

Okay, this is not a depressing post, but something I want to share. I think I like someone who I just saw on a dating app, but I couldn’t swipe him right as the touch screen stopped working (damn). But the next time I saw him, I immediately swiped him right, but my account got deleted and I lost access to it. He stays far away from me. He is definitely a gentleman. I kinda stalked him and found that he is not on any social media platform, but youtube. I know I know, I did wrong, but I had to, I couldn’t stop. He likes traveling, so he used to post his travel vlogs. Really different. Unlike other travel blogs and vlogs, I have come across. Now, I can’t stop thinking about him. Sadly, I do not have any means to reach out to him. I don’t even know if he is dating anyone 😩
I want him to know me, talk to me, and that’s that. But he doesn’t use his youtube anymore and he is not on any social media platform. Be it Facebook or Instagram or even Snapchat. I do not know how should I approach him.
Why is it difficult to reach out to him? Even if I do, what would he think of me? That I stalked him? What’s there to stalk? He is nowhere to be found. I have been in terrible relationships with guys who weren’t my type. But he is. I can sense it. And for that, I have to know if he is single. How do I find it out without him knowing anything? And suppose he is single, then how do I ask him out? Please help 😩