Psychology is what that is nothing more. You’re not a winner, just a slave to your mental condition and the lack of being able to feel emotions like normal people so you derive happiness or ego boost by all this.
Get therapy instead of chasing this empty life. That’s my advice rest, there are many like you who come and go, and no matter how many times you do this, you’ll still have no one (and people who chew you out because there are many that can play people like you like no one’s business) and by the time you’ll realise this you’ll be too old to do something about it.
So don’t chase temporary sadistic ways to feel something, help yourself and experience what real emotions are.
Rest good luck! May your soul rest when it does.
Psychopathy or some other cluster b disorder
