Not sure how do we talk to people here
I am stuck in a situationship since 9momths now, met through a dating app. The guy wanted a relationship initially, but then backed off, we continued being friends. And the bond I share with him is extraordinary it’s friendship, it’s a partnership it’s something I would want permanently, I have talked to him regarding this, but he dosent seem to change his mind at any cost. He still continues to see other girls casually. But he’s also completely invested in me and every single details of my life, but still won’t step up
Why can’t he see the same thing.
May be you should distance yourself from him for couple of months. Then see what he is upto. He will definitely realise If he really cares about you. Otherwise he is just waste of time in your life. Do it as quick as possible.
Thank you so much for responding. All the friends have suggested the same, get distant, date other guys try make him jealous. But aren’t we all adults and what is this politics. I don’t want to induce it in him. I want him to realise it all by himself because that’s what would stay.
Do it for yourself. Don’t do it just to make hime jealous. Even if he feel jealous by dating someone else, you are doing it wrong. Atleast with the new one.
Hey
I am currently dating a guy I met on the dating app. I too want him to be completely invested in me and so far he is loyal enough to not see other girls. So even if he is interested in your life, it’s unfair for him to do this for you. He shouldn’t be seeing other girls. You deserve someone who would choose you
Hey hi, thanks for responding. This breaks my heart so many million times seeing other girls messages popping up on his screen, and all i have to do is sit there being a friend who can’t react. But anyway you’re right I deserved to be chosen, a priority
How have you been doing?
Listen up. If he is wandering around then you have to accept the fact that he doesn’t want to date you at the moment, which sucks. I’m saying this because I’m in a similar situation.
You’re still at a better stage. Because once that guy starts showing genuine interest in some else he won’t be as invested in you as he is right now. And you cannot lame him for that because giving time to the people whom we find attractive is a normal human behaviour. But that will hurt you , a lot.
I share a similar bond with a guy whom I dated but we continued being friends even after we needed things. And just like you, he talked to me the entire day and I was vv happy. Until he found someone who’s v smart and now I can see his attention getting divided and he’s getting a little distant . He doesn’t realise it because I’m still a friend but it hurts me.
This is why I’ll advice you to talk to others, invest your time in something else. Try to be a little independent.
I’m seriously in a very weird situation because I get hurt every day when I see things changing and I don’t want you to suffer as well.
Trust me if something is meant to be yours, it finds a way. So if that guy is casually seeing other girls, distance yourself just a little so that your friendship isn’t effected but you become independent. And if he really deserves you, he will make an effort in the end.
Otherwise , its just a waste of time and energy.
Also, at the end of the day you have yourself. So rather than expecting others to look after you, start looking after yourself because as time progresses, people change and that hurts in the end .
But in a positive way, once you overcome this and become satisfied with what you have , you will become strong and happy , you won’t even crave his attention. You will be happy with however your bond is with him, rather than worrying.
I’m with you , because I’m in a similar situation. Therefore ; I’m sending you lots of love and strength. We’ve got this!!
Hey Girl, first of all lost of love to you too. And I wish we wouldn’t have been in this situation to get over it at all. This is a really bad place to be, you’re always confused, insecure and irritated. But lately I have realised that waiting for them to make the right move won’t help, maybe such people are so self consumed they’ll never ever realise this. So I’m trying to do as you said, be content in my own company now. Thanks honey this felt good
