Maybe, us not talking to each other is the way of the universe to say that it is enough and something needs to be stopped. I’ve been talking to a person for a month now, and we were trying to get to know each other. I like him very much. I love talking to him, and laughing at his jokes. He is a gentleman, family oriented, and has his goals in life. He is somewhat different from others. But the thing is, I am still not ready to be in a relationship again, because don’t want to be in the a situation where I may lose myself again. I am somewhat scared to be in love and to be hurt again. I like him and I still want to know more about him, but I am worried that things may not turn out to be good as time passes by, and that we might just hurt each other. I want him to stay, but I also don’t want to cause burden, stress or maybe toxicity to him. Should I continue not to talk to him, because he does not talk to me as well? Or should message him, just to open a conversation?
Understanding attachment styles may provide clues to how you and him relate to each other. While this is not a replacement for any professional help, there might be an “ah-ha” moment to prompt a kind and loving two-way discussion about the current state of your relationship.
Feeling loved, secure, and safe is the foundation of a healthy relationship. When you feel loved, you feel cherished, respected, and appreciated. When you feel secure, you can share your deepest, innermost thoughts without judgment or ridicule from your partner; and feeling safe means you have the support of your partner to live your life freely.
Respect is a two-way street and he must earn yours as well. He is neither above or beneath you but must learn to be respectful of your feelings as well. Surround yourself with good friends to confide in (if you’re comfortable with that) about this issue as well. They may offer additional insights as they know you best.
Sanket @sanket
If he is a good person from your POV then it is not worthy to lose him.
Set up a conversation, tell him that you have importance for him but both of you should follow certain boundaries. Walking away is a inefficient solution.
Draft your feelings and then express them. If you guys can stay friends without any expectation then that’s great. Talk it out.
Pankaj Kumar @crazyguy3495
I think if you really don’t wanna lose if then try to open up and try to share things with him but first know about him and know about his weakness and strength and see if you still have feelings for him after all if you wanted to have a relationship then you must know about him and look goals of relationship is simple it wanted to live together so better if you know everything because compatibility is more important than chemistry and I hope you understand that
Hello. I can understand what you’re going through. After your first painful break up, you’re always afraid of getting hurt again or repeating the same mistakes. But there is no certainty that this relationship will not work out like your last relationship. There is also no guarantee of this relationship working out. You cannot predict the future of any relationship. Falling in love is a risk. This person can either be the love of your life or another painful chapter. Like I said its a risk. So ask yourself, is this person worth taking the risk? And whatever your heart says, follow that.
Update: he said that we should stop talking, and now I don’t feel anything. There are just times that people reach their limits, and maybe what happed to us is one of those. I know it is for the better. I am just glad that for a small amout of time, I smiled, felt happiness, cared, and loved. Maybe the only time we spent together is the only time we are meant to be with each other. I am just now thinking positively that what happed will cause us peace and will make us a better person.
~I’ll miss you bby.
I am really happy to know that you are taking this whole this positively. I know that it must not be easy for you but I guess it is for the best. Its better to know the truth than live with false hope. This way you can take your time and move on before things would get too complicated. If you are comfortable then you can talk with me.
