Life is harsh and unfair to everyone fine I got it… I don’t expect anything from it now I’m used to it. But then this lockdown start where we have to live at the same place with same ppl and when things started to get worse for me. I know there is issues in every family and no family and relation is perfect but still I wanted to have a normal family but tbh as growing up I have only seen a probalmatic family at some point of time I thought it’s better to be an orphan than living with bunch of ppl who hated each other and they call themselves as family for the sake of ppl. I have only seen quarrel of adults and then they abuse us and it all left me with trauma . I’m too scared to talk to my parents about my mental health and how I was bullied cause they don’t listen they only pressurized and torture us. I remember once my mother and father had a huge fight and they both end up beating me and my sibling in rage to satisfy their frustation and thats how I have lived so far . Whatever our parents go through or any other member in the family they vent it out on us cause we r younger than them and they have right to beat us and say all the harsh words …
I don’t get it why ppl plan to start a family in the first place when they can’t handle the responsibility they hate each other but they made our life also living hell by bringing us to existence. They don’t allow us to do anything they put restrictions on almost everything which we like tbh pre lockdown life was different but rn what been livin’ is the worst atleast before I can escape everything for some when I’m at school but now I’m stuck with them. I just try my best to stay away from them I most of the time locked myself in my room and try to read a book to timepass as I am not allowed to use phone for too long but I was really hiding it all inside me for too long I never shared all this with anyone cause I have trust issues and I still don’t have courage to share it with everyone out there I’m just scared so that why I’m hiding my identity but rn I’m feeling lil better to share it all out.
I truly want this lockdown thing to end and I wish for other to be safe and recover soon all I want isto get all the things to get back to normal I want to meet new ppl n I want to feel happy again by seeing others happy cause I can’t change the life I’m livin’ but I can’t give up on hoping for a better days and till then I have to be strong n find motivation from others…
i am also going through a similar sort of experience and all i want to do is to get out of this place called ‘home’ and be a little free but this lockdown has also made it worse for me. I’ve emotionally become more down and at times i have even wished i were dead 'cause its all just too much for me too take . i too have trust issues 'cause of which I’ve never shared all those traumatic incidents i have been through. my own family would stab me at my weak points knowing how much i’m struggling with those which have made me felt worthless. i’m so glad that i came across ur post and i just want to say that u r not alone in this . i can very much relate to u . thank u for making me feel that i was not all alone in this sort of situation.
Tbh it doesn’t made me feel good at all that u or any other person is going through same thing even worst I don’t want anyone to go through such things … It’s better if I suffer alone but others live a better life . But unfortunately u been going through the same thing and it somehow break my heart cause somehow I can relate to u n I know how disturbing it can be but I hope u turns out be stronger than before and let’s try our best to find strength from our pain we can fight it together let’s be each other’s hope inorder to overcome. I hope you start living a better life starting from now and happiness makes it way to u be strong and have patience it all gonna end soon and things gonna change for better and if u wanna share anything that troubles u feel free to share I’m there for u…
