I’ve been sick for 2 days in the middle of moving and I’m angry now. I feel like in my relationship I don’t have a voice anytime I try to talk I’m always shut down or made to feel I’m stupid and if I say anything once I’m bullied into shutting up I have alot more I could say but ill just leave it there
Hi. I can tell you that at some point, you will start to wonder, “Am I crazy?” or “Am I overreacting?” The answer to both is No.
If your other half truly cares about you - you telling them “You are hurting me” will make them stop and listen. However, I must say - relationships regardless of what kind are a two way street.
If they are hurting as well or feel that you are hurting them, you need to be willing to listen and be compassionate about their situation; just as you want them to be to yours.
I’ve been with the same man for 16 years and I can tell you - it’s never been an easy road. We’ve been married for 14 and I still think he’s CRAZY for choosing to stay with me. For a long time, I felt that he married me to go through the motions and he agreed - yes, he was doing that. However, he realised at that point that even though that was initially the case, he still loves me very much and wanted to continue in our relationship so we asked, “How can we make this real?”
To be honest, it was just acceptance - of each other; all our faults and emotions and I must say, giving that much up - breaking those barriers we all normally break has been difficult but freeing at the same time.
I tell you, watching the first episode of Red Table Talk with Jada Pinkett-Smith and her relationship with her husband, Will Smith about them realising that putting conditions on someone you love is wrong.
We’re all conditioned to believe that if someone you love has done something that normally hurts a relationship. For example, feeling attracted to someone else and doing something about it normally would be considered infidelity and break a marriage or relationship because we say, “If you have an affair then you don’t deserve my affection anymore” and that’s not right. We’re all on this world to be loved; to feel a connection.
I’m not here to tell you - well IF they aren’t listening to you THEN leave. I’m saying if they aren’t listening to you, ask them to. If they truly mean the world to you, then try and ask them to try as well.
I hope that helps :)
