It’s my birthday tomorrow and just can’t get over the guilt that am a failure and not even near to where I want to be. I don’t even think that I’ll be able to be where I want to be in life. It’s been a few years now, and all I do on my bday is cry. Haven’t been happy in a long time now and I’ve forgotten wat it feels like to be happy or peaceful. I stand in front of the mirror N I don’t even recognize myself IYKWIM. Just feel lost like am in a deep pit and there is no way out.
I don’t know if this will be helpful but it’s okay to feel like this . Rather than thinking about that you won’t ever be what you want to be you need to think why you want to be that. My advice is to keep yourself busy , be as productive as possible just engage in stuff even if you feel like laying whole day on bed crying or just feel hollow
It just feels like a deadlock. Can’t sleep at night but can’t get up in the morning as my medicines make me drowsy and can’t get outta bed. Getting up late spoils the entire day and its a really bad feeling
For a few years, I felt the exact same way. I wanted to become a chartered accountant, but I failed 6 attempts. I got chronic migraine attacks, lost a lot of weight, became an insomniac, cut contact with so many people.
Self loathing is really hard, but you learn to love yourself.
I am not a CA now, And I don’t think I ever will be, but honestly, it’s not at all worth it.
Put your health first. Nothing is more important than your mental and physical well being.
Ask yourself why you’re not getting any jobs? Is it because you lack passion in your feild? Take a refresher course, take additional training. Learn a new language, and develop some of your hobbies. Once you find your passion, work on that.
For the time being, attend as manh interviews as possible. Give it your best shot, and take on a suitable job. Don’t keep high expectations. Go to work so that you have something to do everyday, and new people to meet.
It’s going to get better. Trust me.
How long did it take you to find your way
Honestly, I’m still finding my way. Life is a climb, but the view is great.
I’m still in my final year of bcom, whereas all my friends have completed their masters, or are CAs and are working.
It sucks, ik know it does, but it gets better. I promise.
(contd) but please, put your health first. I still suffer from terrible migraines and insomnia, even today. The last time I got a good night’s sleep was 5 years ago. It’s not at all worth it.
ADVANCE HAPPY BIRTHDAY💙💙🥳 pick yourself up and push yourself to become a better person. Don’t be too hard on yourself though. Success has no age bar, you know what you want and what you should do to achieve what you want. Don’t work for it with a negative mindset, be positive and keep telling yourself that you will achieve big things and you will be proud of yourself. I promise, once you work hard and see your dreams come true, happiness will flutter in on its own. Give yourself a break sometimes too. Please don’t cry this birthday, I pray and hope you achieve your dreams sooner or later. But I know for a fact that once you work hard for it, you’ll 100% achieve it. Have great day!
Thank you for your kind words 😊
Means a lot
