Its going to be a long message.
Read it at your own risk.
After our breakup, i was the one who would ask for some BREAK of 2-3 days- break as in-no contact. But still would end up writing email and he would still ask me to call him and i would happily do that as a token of LOVE. This time- he asked for break of 2-3 days and i am so much hurt that he didn’t even contacted me not even a single msg. Everystep he had taken ,made me feel that he is so much dedicated in avoiding me so that he can move on. He hardly replies to my messages when i talk about “us”.
He totally ignores as if those 5 years didn’t existed. I know , there is nothing much left maybe to discuss about but it would still feel nice to have a conversation, to know that he has not forgotten about those times. So,i even got to know, that whatever he was doing - all the things which hurt me that was a kind of indication for me to step back from him because it was awkward for him to say directly to my face. He didn’t even care about our anniversary and stuff. He just left as if nothing mattered. And until now, he was talking to me very politely because he wanted to make sure that i was okay with all the steps he was taking. Because he was pretty much fine with everything and ofcourse didn’t want himself to be portrayed as a bad guy.He is fine without me. But me being so very emotional, he was kind of feeling trapped because of my nature. Which he termed as “ emotional harassment “ that he felt.
I kind of emotionally harassed him according to him, because i would cry at the thought of him married to some other girl and not me. That i would cry at the thought of him moving on. That is how i am emotionally harassing him, by not happily agreeing to see him with someone else.
He even asked me to meet the girl that he will marry. When i said no, he just got very much disturbed because by saying no, i am the one who is keeping him tied to myself !! He wants me to be happy in his happiness that is- moving on ( with me being a side kicked )
I would often cry because he was the guy that i have been physically involved and to that he strongly opinionated as “its not a big deal, you will be happy too, and everybody has their PAST nowadays, you should not think too much about this”
And if i say ANYTHING REGARDING OUR LOVE OR SOMETHING, he often gets irritated and say “ do you not want me to stay happy, why cant you see me with someone else?”
Am i not being obvious ?? I love that guy, with him i pictured my whole life, and he wants me to be okay all of the sudden if he marries someone. Ofcourse if he’s happy, thats ok, he should be, i would never want him not to be happy but for my heart and my feelings I wont be happy, how could i be ?
Now I sort of having the idea of what has been happening. Of course, read all your recent posts and I apologize if my actions are inappropriate here.
Am sure that the guy is supportive, he has been helping you to deal with the breakup right? I remember we have clarified this.
Introducing another girl to you is hurtful, it would have been great if he didn’t introduce her to you. But I believe even he is concerned for your state. He also must be struggling to move on, but he is doing it, right? Please start accepting the situation here. It is this cute little jealousy that is making you uncomfortable. Well, this clearly tells that, the guy is very valuable to you. I cannot completely understand your situation but yeah I do know how it feels when the person you want in your life goes away.
Have you told him that his plan of introducing the other girl to you is a bad idea? It is hurting you more? You should tell him that “PLease do not do any action that will hurt you more”.
Yea its true, he is helping me as well, its just me who don’t want to let him go but now i am trying.
Yes i did tell him about it- and that was THE most absurd idea i ever heard from him. I got very angry about it and just told him that he is no one to expect such thing from me- if he wants to meet some girl which his family acknowledges then thats ok, but I shouldn’t be the one to get hurt. I told him its completely upto him , if he feels ready he should go for it, I’ll never blame him for anything. Its just that- it hurts to see that he has already forgotten about those time, or maybe he didn’t but i do know, he has peacefully packed the past in a box and kept it aside.
Someday, i will too.
Btw I dont know how i just go on and on with you, you have really helped me alot.
No doubt some times are very rough but on those days i always learn something new.
I know i will overcome this thing.
It is commendable that your ex is helping you, you should also let him know how his help/actions go wrong, how it affects you.
Not trying to scare you but the upcoming days will cause more and more emotional ups & downs, those hormonal lochas will appear several times, maybe daily, thoughts will again flood in your mind. You will have to face these rough time again & again, embrace yourself. The sooner you will accept the situation, the sooner you will find yourself in a peaceful state. Pain demands to be felt, only after feeling the pain, it will heal automatically. Eventually, you will overcome but you know that the journey ahead is quite painful. Help yourself in each possible way. Talk to your cousins, friends, do what ever is needed. But in this process, your educational part should stay unaffected, tough but balance it out.
Sure, vent out every day, no worries, but I also expect you to focus on your exams for at least 3 hours a day. Glad to hear that I have been helpful to you, it feels good.
When are your exams scheduled?
Ah, got it from the other comment.
15 days, how well are you prepared?
Am good, just alive to be precise. We can talk later about this later, I think I should let you study, I do not want to distract you, you already are disturbed.
But I will be asking about your exams so don’t mind that :D
It is your last sem exam, right? Enjoy the complete situation here, breakup, moving on, exams, this is such a cliche situation in which you are. Soon you will smile at this part your life :)
Thanku @sanket 😊
Yes i am studying and trying my best to not let this thing interfere at this point.
No its the entrance exam- NEET PG 2021.
I am a graduate , thankfully i am over with that part.
Ofcourse, you can ask about it and no, you are not distracting but yes we will definitely talk later. 👋
Whatever you just said, i hope to laugh loud on this situation.
Take care sanket 💫