In a relationship I was the kind who’d be less insecure about losing the significant other and that’d be with regard to reasons like death. But that was when I had the worst partners. But now that I found a really supportive partner who’s there with me at my worst and at my best. Who just strives to see me smile and does the smallest of the smallest to just keep me happy. But when it comes to me all I do is be insecure and not treat him right as I am scared he’d leave me for someone better. And the irony in that is that I am actually being the worst person and scared that I would lose him for someone better. I mean I know I am not perfect but I know that he means a lot but yet I am not able to treat him well because of the insecurity. We start fighting for the smallest of things. I become this controlling maniac and I know I am the worst possible person to him at times (nothing physically). And it hurts to see him get hurt like this, I asked him to leave me and he said I’d get better just when the right time comes. But you can’t really wait for time right. You gotta make it. I am so scared to try and fail and lose him. I am really scared that my insecurity would be the end of us. And I am going to regret it for the rest of my life. I really don’t know how to trust him when he’s been so good to me. Insecurities are normal but this isn’t. And I want to get rid of this. Please help me. I get insecure and say really hurtful things to him which will eventually push him away from me. Please help me out.
Thank you so much for your reply. But what I need an effective remedy to this. How exactly do I stop this from happening again?
If I wanted another person then why would I stick on and want to get better for this person? I mean I’d leave this person and get along with another person won’t I? I really want to be with him but don’t know why I get so insecure. And really want help in controlling it. I hope this clears your doubt.
Thank you so much and yes insecurities is the issue indeed!
Whenever you feel that you’re going to act out, just ask him for sometime and take that time to calm yourself, try breathing exercises and start counting in your mind. Or sing the lyrics of your favourite song. Communicate with him, what exactly you’re facing and going through. Every now and then just let him know you love him and put efforts. Small efforts will also do the job. Try exercising and write your heart out somewhere to feel less insecure. Also communication is the key, let him know that you’re feeling this way.
Thank you so much for your reply. Will surely try these tips. Yes I do tell him when I am insecure. He listens to me and helps me get better. But can’t depend on him right. I just want to fight it on my own. Sometimes he says that I feel insecure around the others girls because I don’t know my own worth.
See sometimes bad experiences are so overwhelming that the good ones start to scare us but don’t let that happen, cause in the end it’ll just make you more vulnerable. Try going out with him to places you enjoy. It can be a museum, a cafe or anything you think makes you both happy. And most of all love yourself too. You will find a way I am sure. Just keep believing in you.
Thank you so much! And yes we go out on dates and we just got done with a recent trip and I think that was one heck of a trip even though it was pretty tough at times too. But yes I really don’t want it to get spoilt regret would make it worse I guess
If I was that guy I would definitely want to know you all of it bad and the good and be there for you. You have put all of what you feel in the post above. Just take a ss of it and send it to him if you really want to be with him and be there for him. If he really cares and loves you then he will definitely do the same.
Yes will surely send this to him! I mean he does support me at my worst. Even when he feels the worst he just stays with me. We had an argument regarding my insecurity just this evening and he still kept by me. But I got stuck at the fact that this is a cycle and I can’t always get insecure and tell him and he solves it for me
I need to fight it on my own and just hope that I won’t fail.
Will let you know what he says once he sees the screenshot.
Love you for the courage. Hope you will over come all your insecurity too with the same positivity but take your time and make sure to enjoy the process of loving yourself💗
