I went to sleep hoping that he will matter a tad bit less than he did last night but no, I woke up feeling much more terrible. He says he loves me and to a great extent I believe him but it just isn’t enough. He goes days without talking to me without informing me that he’s going and it hurts. I checked if he has messaged me and no he hasn’t. I don’t know why I just love this guy so much, I end up understanding him even if it hurts me. I’ve been in a messed up state of mind for over a year and everytime I think it’ll get better it just gets worse and I honestly cannot take it anymore but again I love him, to the very core.