I want to run away, just run away from my worries for at least some days

3am Thoughts

I feel so... so lost. Like I’m such a boring person, all of my friends seem so confident in themselves, everyone does, I act energetic but who am I like the real me. I just feel sad for no reason, I think I’m lesbian but what if I’m just doing it for attention, i mean I have 5 bi friends 1 non binary friend so what if I’m doing it to fit in, I get lots of anxiety (I haven’t been properly diagnosed) but what if I’m doing that for attention?!?!
What if I’m just writing this for attention as well, I leave school every day feeling depressed, anxious for what’s gonna happen the next day. While sometimes I just feel numb, Likee when my mum lost her phone and we could be in danger, I didn’t feel anything not even scared
What’s wrong with me

LGBTQ

Sometimes I feel like I could swallow the whole sea and my mouth would still be dry.      

- L

Depression

I hate being vulnerable. I hate when I like someone romantically. It's part of being human but I really hate it with a passion. That's also a human emotion right there... Okay maybe hate is the only think I'm on right now lol. #pessimist 

Overwhelming life, overwhelming relationships, overwhelming job, overwhelming part-time course I have no idea how to live my life in the middle of so much going on. I am not able to spend any time with my friends or my family or even my dog because I have so much going on in my life. I feel like ever since 2022 started I have not gotten a single chance to enjoy myself. I haven't even taken a vacation in the last two years. My boss would not leave me alone and whenever I ask for a leave she tells me to work. I have tried to ask them for a remote opportunity for my work but it has been denied. How do I move forward in this overwhelming life? I need my people around me. I need someone who I can tell about my day without feeling so tired that I fall asleep on the phone. I know that my friends are going to be there for me in the click of a second, but I genuinely don't know when to call them over. I don't even have the time to just go on a drive at night in this overwhelming life to empty my mind because the moment I come back home from work I am immediately on the bed passed out within half an hour. Sometimes I even forget to eat my daily meals, and that has resulted in me losing weight, falling sick very often, and having no energy to do anything at all. I have pushed getting my drivers license by for a few months now because I am I just don't have the time.

Career

Me on my way to disappear in the mountains for a week 

"Paper stuff"

Aren't the fishes lost in the sea?
Isn't everything the same under the water?
I'll probably lose myself under it,
I feel already lost through all these paper buildings
They are all the same
Same buildings,
Same people made of chip paper
Without any imagination
They go through life
Like it's an easy game to play
Basic dreams and no form,
Only appearance.
Instead I'm an origami that doesn't know her shape yet.

@cori.spoetry

Confusion

I think my life ain't gonna be better, i had my life through worst and I can't see it getting better

Exhausted

I think there's something wrong with me. I've been told by significant others and friends that I'm amoral, or lack morals. I don't feel sad when someone close to me dies. I don't get queasy or disgusted when things happen that would invoke feelings of that sort out of other people. I don't think I am afraid of anything. I hate failure, but I am not afraid of it. I was brought up in a very success driven home, with severe punishments if failure occurred. I don't know how to open up, and I abandon friendships if the other does not reach out. I used to move a lot in my student days, and I came up with new names sometimes, maybe it was to abandon the friends in the other places. I don't have a problem with most of ^, but I feel alone some days, and resort to bad habits. My mom was a significant figure on my life, in many ways, and she put my family through some trauma. I'm turning out like her, with a dash of apathy. I like to get lost in fantasy world, but I don't think of it like that. When I feel a certain way, I read or watch a movie to forget about my life. I don't think I'm suicidal, but I wouldn't have any regrets if I died. I think I have psychopathic tendencies, such as I lie for fun, or am apathetic. What could I do to be more normal? 

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts