I need some advice on a situation. I am gonna water it down as much as possible but i apologise if it gets long. I hope you all read it and give your inputs because this situation is literally breaking me apart. I’ve been regularly getting sad and crying over this.
So me & my best friend (not anymore :/) have been going through some rocky times for a couple of months now. We’ve been fighting over one thing or another but two weeks ago, we had a very bad fight and she said that she wants a break and some space, so i agreed to it. So we stopped texting each other and only texted when we had some work. So after a week our classes started, like we still travel together, sit in classes together but i don’t think that connection is there anymore, especially from her side. We rarely talk to each other, while commuting also there’s times we don’t speak at all. She doesn’t hug me back when i hug her. So I’ve stopped ofc. I help her with her college work done, so that’s the only time she’d actually talk to me. I even tested here by acting a bit distant to check if she’d notice and guess what, she didn’t! I actually don’t know where i stand her in life anymore. Like whether i should wait or i should just leave, even though i am the one who’s gonna be hurting in the process, since she seems like she’s mentally checked out of this relationship. This is saddening because once i actually meant something to her, she cared about me and then she just stopped. I just became a nobody for her even though I’ve done everything, no matter how small or how big to make her happy. I’ve even suffered a lot of disrespect and it hurts, it makes my stomach turn. I just don’t know what to do.
Look normally when people grow up situation like this happens
U can try 1 more time if u want to hurt ur pride
Bt i will suggest leave
Don’t indulge in this kind of thgs
Poor fellow typed so much and you just replied with two words " move on"😂
Ree isn’t it normal 😅
You gotta live with it! The best is that you should not hope for anything ahead! And try to move on! Start a new life! Find new people
Firstly put yourself first in ur priority list and focus on yourself and do something in which u will feel happy
Hey i don’t know much about how close your friendship is but if it was really solid then i would suggest that you talk to her properly and explain how you are feeling and see how they reply, if she dosen’t react positively then I’d suggest you distance yourself and take some time to heal and who knows maybe with time and a good situation you both might go back to being friends again
We were pretty close (atleast I’d like to think we were), like we shared everything with each other. I’ve tried talking to her and everytime it’s turned into an argument and further damaged our relations. She never tried to understand where i was coming from everytime and instead turned it all on me and made it seem like i was the problem, which was very hurtful when I’ve been nothing but supportive and helpful to her. It’s like nothing i did ever mattered to her. So eventually i stopped telling her what was bothering me because i knew we’d just end up fighting when i don’t want to
Well if she isn’t willing to put the same effort into mending your friendship then maybe you should distance yourself for your own peace of mind because it’s affecting you negatively. It’s not worth it to keep hurting yourself for someone who is not ready do the same for you.
I guess you’re right! I think it’s time i start taking a step back, i know it’s gonna hurt because i absolutely adored and loved her but i don’t think she minds not having me around anymore
Well, it would be best to talk it out Instead of assuming things. I know, it’s not easy as you already said, talking often ends both of you in an argument, but you’d have to live up with the guilt of not having tried one proper conversation, to clear if there was any misunderstanding at all. Tell her, how all of this is effecting you. Tell her, you miss the old days and you would definitely want to get them back. Ask her, what exactly does she want? Where things went wrong? And if she keeps on insisting to stay distant, then do tell her that once you are gone, there’s no coming back. That you’ll be gone for good. That you deserve to be happy and you’ll work for it. I’ve been in your shoes before and I’m still too. Being too clingy could make people take you as granted which comes with not acknowledging your efforts, not being mutual and simply not caring. It’s your cue to stop and reflect on yourself. Is it really worthy? Are your efforts worthy at all? Or maybe they will be well respected from some other or just you, as a person.
I’ve tried to have a conversation about it with her a lot of times, I’ve told her what’s bothering me, I’ve even asked her that if I’ve done something wrong that hurt you but she just gets irritated instead of telling me or trying to understand where i am coming from, it just doesn’t work. I once told her that i didn’t like the fact that she ghosted me for complete 24 hours, kept ignoring me and the answer i got was “i am not obliged to text you” and that was frickin’ hurtful