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ImmigrationThought

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Anonymous

I moved to Spain from Russia when I was 10 years old (16 now) and ever since then I have done everything in my power to fit in with the Spanish people, although I am more into American stuff and plan to move to the U.S.A for college, I still attempted to get into certain things that they are interested in. I have pretty good relationships with almost everyone in my class and I have closer friends who tell me that they love me, hug me and talk to me everyday. The problem is that despite all of that I still always feel left out in group settings, like I often get cut off when talking or simply can´t get a word in and I have noticed that other Russian students in my class have an even worse situation, since the spanish people are nice to them but stay away from anything that can be interpreted as a friendship.

They also plan gatherings and talk about the times that they hung out openly right in front of me, even though they never invite me. For example, 4 of my “friends” could be planning a hang out right in front of my face, without ever inviting me and acting totally normal about it.
I understand that no one is obligated to hang out with me and I am not saying that they only behave like this because I am Russian (although sometimes and taking into consideration how they treat other Russian people, it does feel like it), but it still really hurts and I want to talk to them about it, but i feel like that would be making them feel guilty for not wanting to hang out with and i do not want to make anyone feel bad or fight with anyone
What shoud i do?

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1 reply
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Anonymous

Well, I dont know quite what to say you, just give some time or confront them about how you feel directly, cause if you dont then you’ll always be having the same problem! And well, I had the same problem too but I did say my friends about how I felt and things changed after that. Some of them told me dreadful things and some took it in a very nice way and started hanging out with me more. So, you should do the same. And dont care about the people who leaveor say things that doesnt help you at all, just ignre them and stick to the ones who stay!
Now, its on you that what’ll you do!
-Regards!

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