Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I met him 2 years ago. In 8 days from today, we will close 2 years. And yet he managed to do it. He managed to block me again. After so many moments. After so many memories.
I knew he never cared for me, but I hoped deep inside that he would change. I hoped to close my eyes at some point, and when I finally opened them, to find what I wanted more than anything for two years. To find love, care, satisfaction.But, people never change …They always remain the same and worse.
I met him two years ago when he was hurt. I was very impressed that he opened so quickly while I also felt so important. I felt I deserved to be with someone. I felt I was not rubbish.
We were fighting on a daily basis. I devoted my whole life to him. I had nothing else, I only had him. I knew that whatever we were, it was temporary. It had a specific duration. It would not be something that would last forever. But I wanted to live every time at that moment. I did not care about the consequences. I did not care about the truth and reality. Because I knew from the beginning that I had to stop. I just never wanted to.
I met him two years ago, and I thought he was the most beautiful thing I had ever seen. He was so real, he never lied about what he felt. Within three weeks of talking I managed to fall in love with him deeply. From personality to hair ,he was exactly what I was dreaming for.The ideal man. But it was never him. This illusion withered me.I had dreams for him. I thought that together we could overcome any difficulty and that he could finally find the strength in him.
What I did not know was that he could never find strength while hurting the person that loves him more than anything, he could not just find strength because he was lost long ago.
And one can never love someone who never tried for someone. Who never appreciated (her) for what (she) was.
Because I was a nothing for him, always.