I know the sentiment of words even though I don't understand what you said in a way I do

Me reading my notes a day before my exams

3am Thoughts

I've 2 exams tomorrow but would rather write here and regret tomorrow🙃

College

I apologize in advance for the rant: 
My whole life I've felt misunderstood. Like no one really gives a fuck. My dad killed himself. My mom was a drugie and was never there. I have yet to forgive her therefore we do not get along. My brother and I never get along. I've always been the odd one out. I was molested by three different men. The first is now in prison. The second passed away. However, I forgave him because truthfully he didn't know what he was doing. However, when I told my family what he did they made me say that I was lying. So, when the third did it, I didn't tell. I thought that it was my fault bc it happened so many times and by that point, I was numb to it. Over the years it ate at me, but I knew they wouldn't believe me. I am seventeen and I've had about 13 suicide attempts since the age of 11-12. I've never had someone their time into me and not give up. Everyone always gives up on me. I just don't know what's wrong with me. Why can't I be normal? I have a wonderful boyfriend who helped get me away from everything, however, I worry that my mental health will be too much for him. But it's not like I can just flip a switch and fix it. I'm trying to heal but it's so hard. I feel so hopeless. My heart hurts...I've been in pain for years and I just want to feel okay. That's all...

Depression

Bhai log neet 2023 private mbbs college ke liye minium marks kya hai?

My friends who saw the post, made fun about it. They were laughing about it. Nobody took it very seriously apart from me.

Happy

I feel low and I want my love's company ❤️ but am scared that he will start hating me everytime I feel low.. he basically want me to be happy cheerful girl but what can I do of I have bloody mood swings and miss him badly 
Pc : mine is one sided love .... I proposed him and he said no but still want me to be happy 

One Sided Love

**strive hard**

I'm at the brink of despair, yet I cannot surrender. 

Motivation

how to stop feeling lonely and depressed? its been few years now and i keep sinking in my loneliness every day and this depressed feeling keeps putting a cherry on top of the tragedies of my life. I tried several apps, advices from ppl around the wrld i met online but i just cannot figure out how to stop feeling lonely and depressed. now if you ask why taking advices from online peeps and not those in ur real life? well, to do that the first requirement is having some ppl in real life to share things with in the first place. anything i do(or dont) i keep overthinking over it which added anxiety and depression to my non-sweet dangerously funny life. 
from past few years im just losing my friends on a regular basis, some to new places, and distance, some to new people and some to their selfishness of using me to get their sh*ts done and now i just cannot stop feeling lonely and depressed, its so damn difficult to live this way, but i dont really have much options, i cant quit cuz im not a quitter but a fighter(loser but a fighter), cant take pills cuz expensive and addictive and cant just start changing my behaviour cuz deep-rooted anxiety.
if someone from this good peeps community can help me find the answer to the question of my life - how to stop feeling lonely and depressed, that would be so soooo amazing and i'll be forever grateful cuz the 'how to' of stop feeling lonely and depressed i found online doesn't works.

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts