Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

i just feel like i am bad at everything i do, L as a son my mother means the world to me and i still treat her like shit, L student i my best at school and yet i get shitty grades, L friend i am not there for my friends like i should be and always say the meanest shit, L football player i work my ass off and yet i am still garbage, L person i am so depressed and always have thoughts that i dont know how to get rid of. L muslim i try to pray every prayer and try to get closer to Allah but it just feels like he will never end my suffering and it hurts so bad to feel like your god gave up on you. everyone I know has given up on me, my mom is the most wonderful person in the world and I still treat her like shit, how could I she does her best to make me happy and i am still a litte ungrateful piece of shit, I just wanna go and end it all i want all this suffering to end.