Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I have to tell you guys this, today I talked to my guy best friend, I actually have feelings for him. Should I like a give a lil flashback? Oh wait I think I should hehe.
I changed my school in Class 11th and in 12th I met this guy, I never liked him initially but because of peer pressure I thought I liked him but it was just infatuation. We were having a thing but then something happened that I backed off and we agreed to stay friends after that. Life was going great! We were the best of friends, we used to mock each other, laugh and basically we were having a good time together as friends. I actually had a habit which he never liked which was that I was very reserved and I never shared my feelings or anything with anyone. Whenever we used to have a fight, I would simply back off and not talk to him and pretend nothing happened, idk why I was like that before. Lockdown happened, we used to call each other everyday, we became super close, we used to talk about success, growth good things in general. Then one day on November, something happened and he wrote me something which I didn’t like but I didn’t say him anything and I was a lil mad, after that day we literally stopped talking. It felt like we are parting ways and there’s nothing I can do about it. We literally didn’t talk for 4 freaking months, I kept overthinking why but I never dared to ask him because it was just so hard for me to believe it was happening. I never imagined it, after 4 months I got the guts to ask him why he left this friendship, he told me the reason and actually it was my fault, I had a very care free attitude before. I said I’m sorry for my behaviour and he has forgiven me. Also, he has a girlfriend now but I have feelings for him. Umm I don’t know I just can’t imagine my life without him, talking about his girlfriend, she’s from Japan or somewhere idk they have never met obv, so I am still living with some hopes lol. We talk everyday now.I can listen to him for hours and never get bored. So basically today he asked me that what do I think how long we will stay friends? You know what my answer is forever, sounds cliche but he has no idea how much he means to me! I love him without any expectations:)