Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

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Anonymous

I feel stuck, lonely, unhappy and frustrated with my life. I have been in a loveless marriage in the past 17 years. Initially I was hoping things get better and with time he becomes more loving. He hasn’t. He is not controlling/abusive or bitter person. However he has never made me feel loved or wanted. He has not, even once, said he loves me or initiated intimacy without me trying (ever since our early days of marriage). I have tried everything to keep things “fun” between us…I have tried many times to communicate how I feel. He tells me It’s all in my head. I’m at the point of being mentally and emotionally exhausted of trying to be noticed or loved by the person I’m married to. I find it difficult to leave due to cultural and family obligations…Thanks for allowing me to vent here.

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9 replies
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Anonymous

Sorry to put it bluntly. You are living a dead marriage. Now the relationship has changed to being a roommate kind of arrangement. Either you can keep living the lie or seek your happiness outside. The options remain open to you. Yes it’s all in the head to be happy, either with a non loving partner or with a loving partner. Choice is yours.

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Anonymous

Yes, sadly roommate is an accurate word to describe my marriage right now. Thank you!🙏

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Anonymous

Sorry if I have hurt your sentiments. But in all true respects you should find a way out. The world is big and loving and kind. You just need to find your own happiness.

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Anonymous

Agreed. You were right though. For the sake sake of my own peace of mind and happiness I have to make a decision eventually. Life is too short to live in regrets.

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Anonymous

I have seen these same situations personally so many times. This is no different. Today everyone is facing some or the other issue in their marriage. All I have come to realise is that our own happiness matters the most. People spend their whole life in meaningless relationships and end up realising that nothing changed and they suffered all through out for nothing. It’s just social stigma that inhibit our exit from a relationship. I have seen once people overcome the social stigma they tend to live a healthier and happier life. Note that the people we think about - what will they say if I get a divorce and also struggling in their marriage/ homes. We have to own up to our own happiness. Be your own sunshine. You are the light of the world.

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Anonymous

Is he gay?

@elana

No. He is straight.

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