Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I feel so left out…
my parents just love my younger brother, i am 17 but never got respect as him
He got a new expensive phone i got my mom’s phone passed down to her by my dad
The only reason is i am a girl. the burden
You must be thinking i am immature comparing all the materialistic things but yes. they like him more. they said it to me on my face. like they give him everything and hide it from me. yesterday only my mom and bro went out secretly to eat out without telling me…but in the flow of talking my brother spoke it. my mom tried to cover up by lying…later in evening i found so many bills of places they had shopped from and eaten from in my mom’s activa as i went to meet a friend. and also i didn’t know much but in my brother’s phone i saw him doing his pattern lock and secretly i checked it and found they had eaten out on so many times. pizza and cakes and what not…i feel hurt.also last week i found a new bag in my brother’s cupboard and my mom was like " i bought it for him, any problem?" and i am using the one from 5 years with all stitches…
he gets new chlothes every 2 months…when i asked them to buy me too…my dad says…its my money i will decide who gets what and when so shut up and go and study
I feel so hurt and left out…my mom was never avialible for me emotionally…
Even when my brother is irritating me i just tell him to go…then he tells…its my father’s him i’ll do whatever i want you’ll will marry and go…i will be the one to feed them when they are old…my mom was standing there but didn’t tell him a word.
also last month i was talking to my friends she told she saw my mom dad and bro in a very expensive restaurant in which shewent…she was asking why i wasn’t there…even i was shocked that day they left saying they were going to a relative’s place…
I feel hurt…no one loves me…they hate me…they’ll get me married as soon as i turn 18…i hate my life. they are emotionally avialible for me. when i am sad no one cares for me. when he’s sad they’ll move around him hug him take him out…i also want that 😭😭😭😭😭
all this just because i am a girl?😢