I am very depressed. My 6 yrs old arrange marriage is about to come to an end. I never had a cordial relationship with my mother in law but I loved my husband. Got married in 2014, had a difficult life at in-laws’ home. In-laws moved in with me to my husband’s work city. She created problems b/w me and him. He was a mumma’s boy since the beginning. He even was in constant contact with his ex even after 6 months of marriage. He stopped only when I found out their messages. He apologized and I forgave. But still, things didn’t improve. A month later I moved to my hometown. He came with his mother a few days later and we had a family counseling wherein my mother-in-law blamed me for things I never did and my husband was mum. He didn’t support me at all.
Later I myself apologized to him for no fault of mine just to save the marriage. I know I was a fool. He took advantage and put forth a lot of conditions like I won’t be talking to my mom on phone often, I won’t be telling my mom anything happening at my inlaws, and blah blah.
I agreed to everything and still, he left me and returned to his work city along with his mom!
For a month, he kept ignoring me, he didn’t take my calls and kept saying do not come here. He said his mom would feel bad if I would return. After a month of this nonsense, I asked for a divorce and only then he asked me to return.
I returned. I didn’t want to stay at my parent’s home because there are different problems. We moved to the US in 2015 and things improved. We returned in 2019, being pregnant and delivered my baby boy in May 2019. Mother in law wasn’t good again. problems started erupting and my husband again started becoming the Mumma’s boy that he was.
Fast forward to 2020, my husband brought me back to my hometown. Now with the baby it became even more difficult to stay with mother in law as she wasnt helping with the baby at all. I was actively looking to restart my career as because I was in US, my career came to a hault. When I got a good opportunity, I asked my husband to let me stay with my parents for 2 months so that I can dedicate all my time for the job without worrying about the baby. My parents are very helpful with the baby. This irked my husband so much that he stopped talking to me after dropping me to my parents place. He totally ignored my phone calls and messages. He blocked me on whatsapp. I sent so many vent out messages where I said I wont leave your mom as I know she is one behind your behavior.
In 2 months, things escalated to a level that 2 days back my younger sister and my husband got into a ugly fight. I had been trying to make him understand since 2 months, I tried all ways. He was partying with his mom while I was crying day in and day out.
His party pictures made me so angry that I even emailed this to his office HR. They had warned him which again made him more adamant.
I am feeling guilty even though I know it’s not my fault. I had sacrificed my career for him, cant he support me in my career? would he leave me and my baby if I want to stay at my parent’s place.
Please hep me😩
I understand your situation. But I think it’s best if you leave him rather than going through all the abuse… And yes you are being abused. You are in the midst of so much negativity. It is only going to affect you mentally and physically which will also affect your child.
Whatever happens I am sure your family will support you. You are strong.
You are a strong girl, don’t feel bad because you gave your best. You deserve better, life is long, you will get better. I pray that your life will be best in coming years.
Please get a new hobby, try new movies, web series, travel, enjoy life. Praying for you.
