I am all messed up I don't know what should I do maybe you guys can help. I love this guy so much and he too has feelings for me and yesterday we fought and I said something which he misunderstood and said that he's leaving me. I cried whole night. I told him that he means a lot I told him everything about my fears, my insecurities my feelings everything and he said let's not talk again but then today's morning itself he said sorry he apologized and promised me that he will not hurt me again he asked for second chance and I accepted his apology because honesty I love him too much to let him go but now I am scared what if he'll leave me again. I don't know should I stay and try with him again or should I move on and start fresh. 

I am feeling pretty awful. The prime reason is because I am 23 and I don't have my life together. My partner who I thought loved me. But last weekend, he blew up on me. Then on New years eve blew up on me. I put the clothes he had on the floor in a bin thinking I was helping. But no. I just made him mad. We took molly and acid which didn't help and he got even more mad at me. Asked me what do you want from me to make you happy. I literally just wanted to have sex with him in that moment.

My answer him now. I want you to love me and not be so mean. Like nnow, I need support. But no don't text me, 

3am Thoughts

I miss him so much. I don't think he missed me at all we both are in a relationship. I think my importance in his life has been lost.Our relationship is going through a very bad time.  I don't understand  how I can fix this thing? 
  It doesn't matter to him whether I am there or not.His life is going great without me.  How do I live without him?We had such a long relationship.  I am very sad to see him being so toxic.Everything was fine some time ago.  Our fights has made our relationship toxic..I promised to be with him for the rest of my life.  But now it seems that I have to leave him, but how do I leave him.... What should I do 😔

Long Distance Relationship

Y'all I'm feeling really anxious, cause the guy that I don't even like that much isn't replying to me. Like ik he will but still I'M GETTING SO MUCH ANXIOUS ABOUT IT. I know that I'm not that into him and he's not that great. Why is happening to me lol. I can't even concentrate on my studies. 
The last time this happened to me with another guy, we ended up dating which was veryy bad. Breaking up with him was like reliving my life. Also I'm an overthinker so small things affect me a lot. 
This is so weird so I know I deserve so much better and I know I don't even like him, but still just so badly want his attention and his name to pop up in my notifications again :(

Ps- sorry for the bad writing structure, I'm ready anxious. 

Crush

So there is this guy, we both like each other and we even kissed and made out couple of times. It feels like I have stronger feelings for him but he just likes me and he told he is not sure of what we are and can’t commit because of his family and stuff. I just want to be in the present, with him and I just want to go with the flow. The thing is I don’t have much friends. I always wait for his texts, I want him to take me out, spend more time with me. I get angry or I breakdown, even cry most of the times when he can’t text me, he doesn’t take me out weekends but go out with his friends and I swear like I won’t talk to him ever again. But at the end of the day I end up talking to him and when I think of his position now it feels like he does care for me. He has other jobs to do too, his friendship is older than our relationship and they deserve the time together. He did come all the way to my house when I felt low and hungry for many days. He does spend time with me. I feel like may be I am pressuring him too much because he is the only person I have whom I am close to. I am just confused here. Am I overthinking stuffs or is he really not caring at all? Please say something how not to over think if I am or else how to over come these thoughts.

Mental Health

My boyfriend blocked me and wanted to break up with me yesterday. We are in a long-distance relationship. I just got mad cause he didn't reply to my comment on his post but he replied to other girls. He's been explaining the reason why he didn't and I did not believe him. So he blocked me. Fortunately, I can still open my previous account so I messaged him there and begged him not to leave me. We've talked about it and now we're still together. But he's still mad at me. And now I feel uncoordinated. I have bipolar disorder. Everything became a blur he wanted to break up with me. And taking two of my pills came to my mind. It hurts a lot. 

Bipolar Disorder

My boyfriend cheated on me and I still stayed with him. I find myself unable to trust him yet I can’t leave the relationship. I am the one that always goes back chasing. I feel disrespected and hurt. Things are okay now but I just can’t seem to forget the past and move on. I’m just suffering in silence and it’s eating at my soul. I know I should leave but why is it that I just can’t. Why am I so pathetic god…

Cheating

It was his mistake but a small one he thinks i have a breakdown and I'm ghosting him like i did before. I love him so much and we are friends he cannot even think that i like him but i really wanna talk to him. I have exams in few days and i don't need distraction but not talking to him and thinking about him is still a distraction should i text him he said take your time I'll always wait for you love you❤ now wtf i love him he doesn't know this and him saying love you casually gives me butterflies he thinks i hate him but i can't ever hate him I'll text him after my first exam i don't want him to stay alone because he had me and I'm acting like this will hurt him a lot. See i think a lot about him why don't he thinks like that...? But wait i like him and he doesn't. Ok I'm going back to study bye😩

SHOULD I GO OR NOT??

BACK STORY: Currently living in different states with our parents, both of us unemployed, n finally after 2weeks gonna re(start) our career.. which also means atleast for few months not gonna meet or talk much (he is getting into 2 businesses which means gonna be super busy).

SITUATION: Before starting with hustle, we really wanna meet> spend few days together in peace (Last tym we only met for few hrs in rush).
🙃but we live with Indian parents, so obvsly can't just go.

LOOPHOLE: M allowed to attend my frnd's wedding (same state just 5hrs away) dated 17-21nov. In reality m 🙆 only invited for 20-21nov.

PLAN: On 17th morning ;after my parents set me off in train (to frndz place) I'll board another train to his place (16-18hrs). 
Be with him till 20th night, then leave for my frndz wedding.

😐 CONFUSION: My parents normally call atleast 6tyms a day..how m gonna tackle d noises when m in train, how m gonna lie/pretend about being in wedding for 4days.. +MONEY.. tickets, hotel!! (Still not earning >Last tym he spent ,so obvsly this tym I should> Cant use my cards cuz ghr pe msg jata h.)

😐 Should I go n meet him (cuz bhut mann h) but is it worthy to take risk (m I overthinking?)..Or let go this tym n see whether we meet in future.

Obvsly I need your advice 
Ps. No offense but kiddos/teens maybe this tym plz dnt advice. I need mature people to tell me what to do.

Lastly, Thanks🙃 for reading

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