Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

I am a early 30’s year old divorced mom of 4 . My divorce has been over for 3 years and I finally started feeling like trying dating again . I met this amazing guy and we’ve been dating for 6 months now . Well he called me one day last week after I invited him to meet me for dinner (he hasn’t met my kids yet ) and told me he has a confession to make . He has cold sores and is having them on his lips . I said okay well we can postpone just feel better , but then I got to thinking… does he have herpes ? I was tested just before I started dating again and I did not have it. The following weekend we had planned on doing a hiking trip. I met with him and we had an amazing weekend so I decided to talk to him in the car on the way home . I asked him if he had ever been tested for herpes . He said he knows he has it because he got it when he was 20 years old . So this man has had herpes 1 for 20 years and never told me during our relationship. I told him I accept him and I do , but I think after as much as we’ve been kissing odds are I probably have it now too. He said he didn’t want me to get it so he hasn’t been kissing me during his outbreaks but what are the statistics of a man transferring HSV-1 to a woman when he’s not having an outbreak? I am having mixed emotions . I wish he would’ve just talked to me about it to begin with. I feel like he kind of hid it from me . That makes me feel bad that he couldn’t tell me the truth to begin with . Also, he and I are sexual and he does go down on me quite often . Does that mean I can get HSV-1 genitally as well? My worry is I still have wounds from past relationships and I worry he will leave me and I will be left to navigate dating with HSV which is not easy. I joined a herpes support group on Facebook. I am also getting tested again this week . But even if I don’t have it now I know the longer we stay together the more inevitable it will become . I don’t know how to feel about it honestly.