We can't be happy till we start living alone , in a separate house.

I was in an on and off relationship with my ex for almost 4 years..He just broke me in so many ways. But i considered him my best friend.and it was always him that i trusted the most. After we broke up. I tried to move on. I did so many wrong things. One is going into another relationship with another person(whom I knew and considered a friend. We came into a relationship after I knew he had feelings for me) within 2 months of breakup just to forget him.. Because by then I had lost a lot of things  and I was desperate to not let him enter into my life again. Now this second guy is understanding and supporting and we have grown really close but I don't know if I trust him or love him. I don't know what to do.. I keep asking myself all sorts of questions.. And I really wished I could talk about all this to my parents or my friends.

Lonely

I met someone through matrimony few months back. My big brother  and I met with his family and all was going super fine, he was quite interested in me.. He used to message me a lot but i was confused about starting conversation since due to some reasons my parents hadnt met him and i was scared of being too close emotionally with him. After about 7 months my parents who live quite far from here came here and met the guy and his family.. They liked him a lot and family as well. When i was given second chance to talk to him.... I had to talk to his cousin sister as well... Our thoughts clashed this time... I am a working girl and i demanded helping hands for the household chores and as well i made it clear that i will be doing 70 percent of the household work and 30 percent to be done by the guy... This  wasnt appreciated by his family... They totally misunderstood me... They thought i m someone who is not going yo helping at all in household chores. They denied to move  further. My problem now is i cant stop myself thinking about the guy. I dont know what are his thoughts about this matter, i have no contact with him now but i really do miss him. I dont whether its an obsession or something else!! 

Mental Wellbeing

Hey! Hope you all are doing good.
I got married a few months back and before
marrying the guy (arranged marriage) he told me
about his past. He has a kid from another woman
which as he says, was a mistake and he told the
woman to not keep it because he was just 22
years old but she still chose to keep the baby.
Now that he is 32 and we got married, idk its
difficult for me to accept the reality. Not that the
kid lives with him or something, but he takes care
of the kid financially and on the other hand, we
are struggling financially. When its time for our
honeymoon, i, who was very sure of not spending
our honeymoon in our home country, still chose
to stay back and go to some nearby city because
he told me very clearly that we are not in the
position to spend that much money and i did
support him. Not just the honeymoon, but even if
i want to buy anything which is worth more than
rs1000, he'll remind of the money problems. But
now, he says that his son needs furniture and he
just said to me very normally that he will have to
spend 50-70k ATLEAST. Whenever its about his
kid, he doesn't think of the money. I mean, idk
how i should feel about it. Whenever he talk about 
the kid idk i just dont feel good. I am not a mean person but I've never had all these feelings
before.
Please suggest me what i should do about this
situation and my feelings.

Adulting

How do you know if u are/ aren't in love with a person anymore whom u used to love to bits. I'm not sure anymore and I don't want to hurt my boyfriend or be unfair to him. He keeps texting me when I ask him not to. He keeps trying. But I don't know anymore. I am not able to let go or be with him. I'm not able to move on. It feels like I'll never be in love again. Telling our parents about our relationship has strained it so much now i feel like I don't even want it anymore

Stress

Okay so I really loved loved this guy he lied to me all the time that he was single when he was not.I was never in a relationship with him. It was almost a situationship,(yes he cheated on his gf with me *unintentionally*) he says he never looked at me in a romantic way but then we did all the things like couples. He admits it in front of people that he gave me fake Hopes and he was wrong but he didn't realise it back then.
That girl and he broke up when she got to know he was playing with her as well. And today I found out in the span of 10 months he dated a girl and now he's in a relationship with another girl. (Yes please this guy is a playboy.) Like I know all of this is really toxic and I need to move on but I don't know I'm not able to. It's been a year since I'm trying to move on but one way or the other I end up wanting him back. He may not have loved me but I surely did.
And i hate feeling this way cause I'm stuck and it's affecting my career and mental health so much. I already have anxiety issues and borderline personality disorder it's just so difficult for me to ACT NORMAL.
Today I had several breakdowns. Let's just say I've been crying since morning. I don't even have many friends. And bringing up this guy's topic just makes me feel I'm burdening my friends with my problems which doesn't even makes sense. Like even they must be tired of explaining me the same thing over and over. This is just so exhausting like I need a holiday away from everyone and all of this drama.

Breakup

I have been in a relationship twice earlier. Both of them broke my trust. It was really difficult for me to trust somebody again. During my lat relationship, when it almost ended, I came to know that one of the closest man in my life also did something similar (he is family member). This just broke my heart, I had no hope for love, commitment and trust into somebody, especially men! Since then I am suffering from depression and anxiety issues. It took me almost 2 years to realise and process what all is happening with me, I am now much aware about these conditions and can help myself at times.

But while I was into all this, I met a guy at a friend’s wedding. I had seen him earlier in the same common friend’s stories too. So I was trying to see whether he is the same guy or not. Then after the wedding he sent me a friend request, we chatted for almost whole night, 5-6 hours at a stretch. Exchanged numbers and talked for almost 2-3 hours. We instantly vibed! I dont know why but I had an amazing feeling and he felt the same. We met the day after, spent almost 5 hours together and felt amazing!! We chatted for almost 2-3 hours the same night. We met again on the other day, spent 3-4 hours again! The connection was instant and I was already in love with him. But he wasn’t sure about it because it was just 3-4 days and he felt like I am getting serious for him and he isn’t. He told me someone left him after being together for 6 years, it was long distance and did not work. So he was afraid as might have to move out cause of his career choices. That was the reason within a week he said I don’t think I am ready for any sort of relationship right now. Thats it! It was a long text and everything was over. Did not even felt the need of meeting and talking things out. I felt devastated and it was so disheartening because the way we had a time together was totally different then what we were going through that time. I felt bad about the fact didn’t he feel the need of meeting and talking things out and giving a closure so that we both can move on in our lives, it might have been easier than what I am feeling right now! 

Now I am very much afraid to even like someone. He being so mature and understanding person, can do this then how do I trust people now. Whatever I felt with him, was something I use to fantasise about, I never thought I would meet somebody who would be that much compatible to me. But then destiny wanted something else, altogether. Everything was finished on a message note! 

Memories

I'm trying. I'm trying so hard. I'm trying to move on. I'm trying to forget him. I'm trying to pretend he didn't shatter my very heart and soul. But I can't.  Every person calling my name is his voice. Every object I see is something that reminds me of him. My Mom made butter chicken last night. I normally love it. But instead, I excused myself, said I didn't feel good, and went and cried myself to sleep. Butter Chicken was his favorite. He said that was what he was going to make for our first dinner in our new home together. Every time the numbness or the pain fades away a little bit, it just comes back stronger. 
I'm such a fool. I truly thought I had finally found the one. I thought he loved me. Instead, once again, I fell and gave my entire being to someone who didn't care. And now once again, I am broken. Except this time....
I don't know if I can ever be whole again.....

Anxiety

So I've been in a relationship for 2.5 years now. at the beginning of the year my boyfriend had to leave for work for 6 months and while he was gone I met a guy and we totally hit it off and became really really good friends. Somewhere in those 6 months my bf and I took a break and me and the other guy started hanging out more and well one thing lead to another. So after the 6 months my bf comes back and we decided to work on things and we've been trying but I can't seem to leave the other guy. I like both of them soo much and I dont want to lose either of them and I know I'm being selfish and a terrible person but I just I love my boyfriend and I care so much about the other guy and ive tried to stop talking to the other guy bu it never goes through buy u I can't break up with my bf

Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts