Hopefully it’s nor against the rules of this app to post about this stuff but…i’ve been married for 8 months now and i still…haven’t done the deed with my husband. I am just so so so so so so so so scared of it…scared of the pain, mainly, but also about other things…im not sure what to do. My husband wants to be intimate with me, naturally, and it must suck for him to wait this long…i dont know how to feel ready. Anyone has tips?
Hey relax it’s okay. And no need to be scared. It is not that bad as how you think. Give yourself some time then go for it
Thank you…it’s a bit embarrassing for me to be so scared at my big age haha but still…its such a big fear of pain that i genuinely dont think i’ll ever be “ready” so i think the best is just to go for it and if it hurts it hurts…
Ideally it is not supposed to be hurtful. So yeah go for it, you won’t regret
Any reason to be afraid so much?
Disgustingly enough i was raised in a culture in which being a virgin = being pure. So eventhough i am married and like…its ok for me to have sex, in my head i just wont be “pure” anymore. Which is a really messed up way for thinking, i am a 100% aware. Ive just been brainwashed that much. Also what if one day my husband decided to leave me…would anyone want to be with someone that isnt “pure”? Again very messed up way of thinking, especially since my husband has been an amazing person to me. It’s just my weird brain…
So basically it’s your mind games thats affecting you, a solution is their , please connect
Heyyy are you alright…
It’s okay to feel scared and nervous.
Just give yourself some time and prepare yourself for the same. One day eventually you have to do it. And it will be the most beautiful experience you’ll ever have. You’ll even start loving your husband even more.
And much respect for your husband. He is so understanding and mature and he loves you so much that he’s giving you all time yoy need.
Yes there will be pain. But it will be just for once and then it wil be gone.
Don’t worry relax. And stop overthinking.
Start slow as in…hugs…get comfortable in each other’s touch…u can try doing it when you both are comfortable…
ALAG ALAG @alag
See if you want some time so share the same with your husband, share your thoughts and everything you are worrying about… communication is the key to solve all problems. Generally it takes time to build a bond between two new people if they don’t know each other from very start. So whatever your feelings are share with your husband its the starting point to all happiness. ☺️
its okay, love. nothing embarrassing about your age! everyone does different things in different age. i’m sure you’ve done many things that older people than you haven’t yet. everybody has their time line :) don’t feel bad about it, be happy that you have a husband who is patient and waiting for you. you don’t meet people like that often. about the pain, well i’m not gonna lie, it certainly is gonna hurt the first few times but after that you will get used to it and even start to enjoy it. it’s frightening to try new things, i know, but you’re only winning by doing so. good luck, love.
Hey don’t scared of enjoying very beautiful moments of life. Just go for it until you experience you can’t realize it is painfull or it gives full of happiness and satisfaction, so be ready to face the fear and just go for it