holidays
birthdays
i can’t even see you on my worst days.
hoped for a father,
only got further,
felt like it was just yesterday.
apologies on repeat,
just like broken records.
make me believe that you love me.
make me believe that you miss me.
rely on me,
have faith in me,
please don’t turn your back on me.
let me turn back time,
bring back the rhymes that you used to sing to me,
in my dreams.
when i was 6 i hoped
to be like you when i grow.
now i know how you did it,
fucked it up,
bit by bit.
I lost my father when I was 7. He was in the army, and he sacrificed his life for the motherland. This isn’t the same as the hurt you feel, but we share the emotion of loss and grief. The absence of a father. As wonderful as my mother has been in giving us a beautiful life, only you know the value of something you don’t have. There will always be that void, despite how tough I make myself, despite however I might feel about this not impacting me anymore, I will always miss you Dad.
