Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

share your deepest feelings and emotions in a safe and supportive environment.

⚕️Depression

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😰Stress

💗Relationships

BoyfriendThought

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Anonymous

Hi. I needed some advice. I have a boyfriend of 6 years now. And i love him. Our relationship is going great. Recently, another guy from my workplace started giving me attention and flirting with me. I told him that I’m not really comfortable with this. And he stopped. This guy is really sweet. Today, he told me that he really likes me and just honestly blurted out his heart to me. I told him politely that i don’t think of him in that way and we should stay friends. Now I’m feeling really guilty that i didn’t tell him about my boyfriend. I just didn’t want to hurt his feelings. And wanted to subtly reject his advances. But deep down, now i feel i should’ve just told him that i have a boyfriend. What do I do now? Should I bring this topic again with him and tell him this time? Or just let it go?

Profile picture for Now&Me member @shivay2595
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Profile picture for Now&Me member @tia_rt
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22 replies
Profile picture for Now&Me member @shivay2595

Shivay @shivay2595

If again tells you or make any advances then tell him politely and firmly that you have a boyfriend and you are not at all comfortable with this behavior of his

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Anonymous

If i tell him now will he feel that i was giving dhokha to him by not telling him the first time? I don’t want to lose the friendship we have.

Anonymous

That’s the thing, the friendship is there because he likes you, you can’t have it both ways, you gotta tell him the truth and let him move on, it’s not just about you, this thing.

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Anonymous

Okay. So I’ll wait and watch. If he says something again or makes any advances, I’ll tell him.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @shivay2595

Shivay @shivay2595

See if also values you as much as you do. He will not break the friendship. And how will it be a dhoka. You are telling him the truth.
Agar nahi bataogi to dhoka hoga.
And if he asks then say that you were not comfortable enough to share this boyfriend thing with him.

@ethan_

Perfect😄

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Anonymous

Bhai yr tum sb kitni overthinking krte ho

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Anonymous

To kya karu fir? Chhor du is baat ko?

Sanket @sanket

If you feel regret then you can mention about your boyfriend in some other way as well, this can be achieved via other topics as well.
Since you find him a sweet guy, the connection, the friendship matters and you can also convey this as well
Having boundaries is healthy and safe as well, and constructive

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Anonymous

If i tell him now will he feel that i was giving dhokha to him by not telling him the first time? I don’t want to lose the friendship we have.

Sanket @sanket

You haven’t lied to him previously, have you? So technically dhoka to nahi diya, but the question is did he catch any signs or hints from you? If yes discuss around at it constructively
And as i said if you feel to share about your partner then it can be done in another way, for example you can mention that you and your partner are planning to visit so and so place or something like that, importance is to mention about your partner but in a slightly indirect way

And of course you shall try to cherish this bond as well within boundaries. He may get hurt but also support him and create a good bond

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Anonymous

Thank you for taking out time to reply. I really appreciate it.

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Anonymous

I was that workplace guy in the past. So i think I can give you the best advice and the best advice is that you should tell her instead you should meet them both. You were supposed to be loyal and dont make it worse otherwise it’ll become love triangle 🌚😂. He’ll realise soon just stay on your side.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @tia_rt

Tia✨ @tia_rt

Dude don’t be over emotional… Hundreds of people will gonna come and go… Ok so u can’t take care of everyone’s feelings and emotions… Kitna bhi krlo u can’t make everyone happy… So tell everyone bluntly that u have someone already… Or yai jo second thoughts aa rhee hai na dimag mai… U like lil attention or whatever… Stop seeking for it… A girl who like attention from everyone… Will not be…
So set ur morals ethics values and standards for urself… Be a queen and queen don’t seek attention… So be blunt to everyone… Be straight forward… Or clear minded… Don’t enjoy lil fancy ✨✨

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Anonymous

Listen. You’re defeating the whole purpose of this space by being so judgemental towards me by calling me an attention seeker. I thought this was a judge free space where you could share your feelings. Secondly, if i was looking for his attention,i wouldn’t even re consider telling him the truth about my bf and would’ve easily gone with the flow. But I’m not like that.

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Anonymous

And please, stop using words such as morals and ethics and values. This incident has got nothing to do with it. You sound like a 16 year old kid.

Profile picture for Now&Me member @tia_rt

Tia✨ @tia_rt

Taking my words in opposite direction… But it’s usual coz we are texting… Would u like to dm!?

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Anonymous

Tell him quick,we boys think if. Not today you might fall for us some other day,he will keep dreaming about you,after telling about you to his friends he can’t take if you are being with some one

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Anonymous

Hey, How are you doing now? and How is life in large?

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Anonymous

Hey. Doing great now. I told him about my bf and he’s fine with it. We’re still friends. He doesn’t cross his boundaries. He sometimes jokes around me like pulling my hair or something but never makes me uncomfortable or awkward.

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