Hi.
I am not okay.
my parents want me to become a doctor. But I want to do something else. Even I had thought of becoming a doctor cuz of which I had opted for biology in 11th grade but I passed 12th this year and found out that my interest lies elsewhere. But when I told them that, their behaviour became really toxic. They laughed at me, said things to me… guilt tripped me by saying that I have reduced their lifespan… that I’m a cheater. My parents allowed me to pursue my dream but even now my mother comes to me and starts crying. She says “we have done so much for you, you should also prove yourself and make us happy. You are playing with your career. Medicine is such a secure and respected profession.”
In their opinion, there is no profession greater than a doctor’s and that all doctors earn so well and even if they aren’t successful at least they’d earn enough to support a family. (That’s the case in India Idk about other countries.)
I feel anxious and scared at my home all the time… I want to run away from here… it’s really toxic.
I have always been an underconfident person. Now when I was FINALLY sure about what I want to do and was willing to work hard day and night, they are pulling me down and making me lose my confidence all over again.
The last three months have been really hard for me… anxiety took over me… so much so that it affected me not only mentally, but my physical health also deteriorated.
I feel on edge.
I really don’t know what to do. Did I make the right choice by listening to myself? I know I took the decision late but I am only human. I have always lived in so many restrictions that I didn’t even know what all options were opened for me. Ever since I was a child, I used to hear about just these two professions- engineer and doctor.
These days I don’t feel like talking to anyone. I zone out. I start crying randomly. I get dreams of my mother taunting me and showing me the bills of things as they think I only want to waste their hard earned money and nothing else. I thought I needed therapy… but when I spoke to a psychologist, they said that not me but my parents need therapy more than me. I know they are concerned for me and want me to have a secure career, but if that’s the case then every child would only pursue something that gave security irrespective of whether they are interested in it or not.
What are your thoughts on this?
as I think ur right btw did u change ur course from doctor?.?
first thing! u cant really get interest if u do something which is forced by someone elz
2) u will never be satisfied w what u have like even if u become what ever parents said or not become u always feel like I thought of doing this but ended up over here…
3)u r the one who is doing it so u should be happy w whatever ur doing if its forced then u never ever ll be happy
so I think u should do what u like the most not cuz someone forcing u to do!
and thank fully my parents are okay with whatever I wanna do but yeah they were same as ur parents before but I said them that if I do something which I don’t like I ll never succeed and will never be satisfied…so they understood and they accepted to it!
