Hi. Are there any Indian BAHUS here I mean Daughters in law? Just wanted to know how do you deal with the tantrums and hurtful behaviour your in laws throw at you.
Ignore it I know it’s not easy but it is what itis they aren’t going to change…just make sure you don’t mess up with your mental peace…
Ek kaan se suno dusre se nikal do …
Be patient
Yea that’s true, but it takes away the charm from you and your husbands life :( how can you grow as a couple in toxic environment ??
I am a teen gril never been in relationships it wouldn’t be accurate but what I feel is if your husband is mature enough he will understand though he won’t react to the tantrums of his own family because you know if he will react to it ultimately are going to hear (iske ane se mera beta badal gaya n all that ) … N tbh boy are really very bad at all this they are simple people if you give love to him and his family he will do anything for you… but he should also raise his voice against his family if they cross their limits!!!
Adjustment is the Key I know its very tough for you to adjust but give it some time … Be patient with them they will realize your worth !!!Please try to stay with your in-laws never leave them !!And also you priority should be you , your mental health and your husband!!!
Never let their words affect your behaviour…i know it hurts alot…but sometimes you just
need to Ignore ,not because you are wrong, but Because not Everything required your energy…and involving in argument everyday brings nothing but destroys your mental peace…so choose peace over chaos…in my way of thinking ,just do your things.and try your best thats all you can do…
I understand ignoring is the best option and I do that but you know those things keep running round and round in your brain how to deal with that?
I understand that situation my mate…the thing you can do is to communicate with your husband or anyone who makes you feel heard …but not in the form of complaint just in the form of discussion.
You want to feel heard and understood … maybe it won’t change many things around you, but it Will makes you feel better
What are theys saying?? I mean is it like u r not doing househokd jobs n all??
I mean ur in laws
Actually the problem is I am punjabi and my laws are Marwari. I used to do everything that a wife is supposed to do but they kept taunting and humiliating me behind my back amongst relatives. Then I stopped and hit their ego that how has she started taking stand for herself? Then they started taunting me and brainwashing my husband that my mom is teaching me all this. Due to their bad nature they are already suffering their own daughter (my sis in law) is getting divorced still they don’t understand problem is with them not me.
Oh was urs was love marriage i guess… Hmm can u try for a job?? It is difficult for u to study with all the responsibilities i can understand…and wat is ur husband’s stand on this?? Is he saying that u r wrong?? Or is he taking neutral stand?
Well this goes in steps
1. He will notice what they( mom and sis in law) are doing and ignore it
2. Then I go and ask him why you ignored that thing
3. He will say I did not understand that time now when you are explaining me I am understanding
4.Then he ll delay it for few days
5. Then again I ll remind him
6. Then he ll go and ask his mom like a small kid “mumma aapne aese kyun kiya” that too when his dad is not around. If his dad is around he can’t open his mouth and his dad never accepts that his wife is at fault he points a finger at me only.
Sometime rather than going through such long process I give up and come to moms house then he starts calling and saying it won’t happen again I ll speak up at right time.
And this cycle is never ending.
Mmm ok… Well i don’t think that u r someone who wud manipulate ur husband against his family… Wel thats good values ur parents taught u… Can u like try for some job?? U must be having a degree i guess… Its difficult with a child n all… But can u try?? If u can then do that
