Hey everyone. I’m new to this, but definitely feel like I’ll be heard here.
I was in a relationship with a guy for 4 years. The first few months were difficult since we couldn’t meet often, and there were a few small fights which made me quite insecure. Few years later he brokeup suddenly and kept blaming his work life for it. And then slowly started blaming my behaviour for it. After 2 years, I’m still here, but he keeps coming back and forth. I’ve not been able to let go. Feels like I’ll be giving up on a major part of my life. He’s very firm that he doesn’t want me, but will message constantly, be around constantly.
How am I supposed to go about it?
Hey there! Maybe it’s time for you to cut off. You’d only be wasting a lot of time and energy and definitely a major part of your life on him. He’s definitely not worth it and you deserve way better! And you will find way better, I guarantee you. I was in such a situation a while back and cutting of was the best thing I ever did. I’m happier now.
So my advice to you would be don’t talk to him, don’t just be there whenever he decides to message you in his own time. And it will be difficult. It will be a rollercoaster ride but it will definitely be worth it and you’d come out as a happier person. Surround yourself with friends, distract yourself with hobbies and that will make it easier.
Hey Neha! Thankyou so much for being there! Really helpful <3
Hey there ! Before thinking about how you’re supposed to go about it, think about how you SHOULD go about it. What would the intelligent self say ? Block him, and move on with your life, right ? That’s probably the best thing you can do for yourself. If he is quite firm about his decision, you should be, too. It maybe wouldn’t hurt him to ping you, but it would somehow keep YOUR guilt and feelings alive.
Block or do whatever you can to stop him from texting you, involve in your life and aspirations, you will eventually thank yourself.
heyy! I’m so glad to have vented my heart out. Thanks for being there <3
Heyy, from an outsider’s perspective, that sounds very toxic. I feel like you should persuade him to make up his mind and either stick to his decision or stop blaming you for stuff you’re not responsible for. He’s (maybe unintentionally) messing with your head and you deserve someone more decisive than this. 4 years can mean a lot of history and a lot of baggage but if he stresses you out more than bringing you peace, then you know what to do.
Power to you xx
Hey, It is one hell of a toxic bond. I can do anything to get out of it and make myself happy. Just need the courage to let go off things.
Thankyou so much for being there <3
More power to you, hope your decision makes you the happiest :)
