Sharing Our Innermost Thoughts

Hello. I met this guy back in 2018, we were best friends and with time we fell in love… I’m from an Indian household and being in love is a sin here. So we were in love for 2 years then the lockdown kicked in we argued for literally everything and with time I felt like i lost interest in the relationship and I atleast wanted to stay honest with my parents so i ended it. It’s been more than a year since we broke but I’ve never felt nlike I miss him or lost him… i feel like there’s a deep sensation that tells me that he’s right there with me and I can never lose him. But yesterday reality kicked in I lost him, he moved on and then all these made me realize that I never felt good and happy like when I was with him. I never had butterflies around him but it was easy. I don’t know if it’s him I’m missing or the way he made me feel… all I know is no one can treat me the way he did and no relationship can be easy like his. Yesterday I gave him request in insta and he accepted… should I text him? Or not for the sake of my family. But I’m scared to lose him once and for all… is it true love if you don’t miss the person?? Should I text him? What would you do if you were in my heels… please help me out…