Are Loneliness and Being Alone The Same?

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@ishika
12 Oct 2020

Being alone has the power that very few people can handle.
-Steven Aitchinson

It takes courage to stand alone for yourself in a world where people are deluded by the feeling of ‘so-called’ companionship. In the name of status, people run to form relations that are bound to break, failing to commit in the most important bond – the bond between one’s body and soul.

We keep investing in unnecessary relationships and keep chasing the materialistic pleasures. There is a huge difference between being lonely and being alone. We chase people and yearn to be like every second person we meet, losing our individuality in the process. One must remember that being on our own gives us the power to see and retrospect ourselves.


You are not a Loner

Bonding with yourself does not label you as a recluse. It is completely fine devoting some time in yourself and trying to get to know yourself better. There are some people who are completely okay spending time alone but some may find it extremely strenuous and problematic.

Such extroverts and social butterflies constantly lookout for company and have the urge to be surrounded by people. The alone time for them can be boring and mind-numbing. But it is important to understand that a person may not always be able to have a circle of people he demands. You need to give some moments of your life to yourself alone.


How to be Your Own Best Friend?

Go down the memory lane

Flip through the family albums and old photographs. Deeply feel the exuberance of the nostalgia that sparks from the act. Your old, happy memories will lift your mood and you sure will have a smile on your face. It will refresh and brighten your soul. Nostalgia is a beautiful feeling. If some of your important photos are scattered, try creating a scrapbook.

When alone your mind may wander around and avoiding unpleasant thoughts reminiscing on time well spent may help create a sense of company for yourself. During your alone time pamper yourself, click photos of yourself in the weirdest poses and with funniest expressions. Make a journal of your memories, record, and capture each and every day. Smile and laugh for yourself for it will make you really happy to be alive.


Go Buy a Diary

Get into the habit of writing and recording the events of each day. It is a fun activity. Writing a journal would be helpful in organizing your thoughts and ideas. Keep a personal diary and make it your best friend.

Pour out your feelings, jot them down and vent out all your frustration, it will help you to relieve stress. Don’t keep your feelings bottled up. Share your happy moments, write about sad, unfortunate events. When you try to inscribe your sentiments, your mind will feel at peace. Furthermore, writing on a regular basis could help you with the language and may be efficient in increasing your vocabulary. Alone time can be really exciting and enjoyable if you put yourself to work in the right direction.


Rejuvenate your Body

Take care of your body. Have a peaceful mind and be happy. Nourish your body and soul, give yourself the care and energy you need. There is a lot that can be done to stay physically and mentally fit. You may want to try out these fun activities.

  • Dancing to the Beat

    Play your favorite music and start moving with the rhythm. Dance like no tomorrow as when you are away from the judgemental eyes and alone no one is watching.

  • Meditation and Yoga

    Relax yourself with some meditation. Revive your soul with some quiet peaceful time. Studies and research provide promising evidence that meditation and yoga reduce stress, anxiety, insomnia, and lonesome feelings and social exclusion. Along with some meditation and yoga try some simple and light exercises which helps in some body movement.

  • Feel the Nature

    Go take a stroll in the park nearby. Feel the goodness of the breeze and relish the scent of earthy soil. According to a scientific review based on the benefits of nature experiences, connection with nature can improve health and mood. The smell of nature proves to provide numerous psychological and physical benefits.


You may also read: 10 Things to do at Home to Feel Better


Nurture your Hobbies

You must have something that you really enjoy doing. Believe it or not, every person holds an artistic and creative side within him. It is just waiting to be discovered. When alone with no one to disturb you or bother you, it becomes the best time to discover and explore your talents. Be it cooking, baking, painting, or singing, identify the artist within you. It will be a life-changing experience. It will help you gain confidence in yourself and you will surely appreciate the frenzy and ecstasy that will rush within you.

According to a Japanese study correlating leisure activities and mental health status, participation in various hobbies and other leisure activities relates positively to mental health status in middle-aged men and women. It could be helpful and beneficial in the overall wellbeing. Life is hectic, with bundles of assignments and projects pending it can become really difficult for us to enjoy the things we really love to do.


Pamper Yourself

Dress elegantly and head straight to a high-class restaurant and treat yourself to a fine meal and some expensive wine. The feeling will be wonderful. The relaxing quiet environment and the aroma of the wine will surely lift your spirits.

You may also go out for some shopping. Buy yourself a beautiful dress, some stilettos or sneakers, anything you feel like. Shopping alone might sound a bit boring but try it out once and you will be hooked. This kind of experience is not bad once in a while. After all, what’s the harm in devoting your paycheck exclusively to yourself at least for once.


Be Positive

Imbibe positivity in yourself. It is the one virtue that can help you lead a happy life. Life is tough and has its share of ups and downs. But when things get difficult, learn to stand for yourself and face the challenges and struggles of life with a positive outlook.

The people in your life will come and go and not everyone is lucky enough to have strong bonds that go on a life long, so it is also a good idea to stand independently for yourself and deal with life as it is. Being alone and happy is not a bad idea. People are needed, of course but there will be times you need to take care of things single-handedly and at that point, you need to embrace your alone time happily in the most optimistic way.


Feel the Magic of Words

Being alone all by yourself, there will be the time when you feel bouts of boredom. During your free time instead of sitting idle, read something. It could be anything from a serene poem to a mysterious novel. You could also keep yourself updated by reading news or some informative articles. If you ever feel down during your alone time, try connecting to people through some online forums. Communicating and talking about yourself and knowing about various other people sometimes help you to feel a lot less secluded and forlorn.You may love being alone yet sometimes you can’t just help but feel cut off from the world.

At such difficult times online forums that don’t judge you and instill positivity come to the rescue. Giving time to yourself is important but being connected to people is equally important. Now&Me is one such place for people who yearn for company yet find it difficult to express their emotions.

Now&Me is a platform where you can ask for advice, give your valuable suggestions and voice your opinions without the fear of being judged. It is a good place for you to express yourself and learn from the experience of people who have dealt with the struggles of life in the most beautiful ways.


Written by Ishika
Edited by Batool Kamry
Illustration by Annanya Chaturvedi


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