3am Thoughts

Everyone Promises are Forever until they Find Someone New... 💔

Now I’m in the fucking hospital😐…

Self Harm

Life is a gamble from minute to minute so play it today for all there is in it. The flick of an eye lash, the quirk of a smile. A good deed here and there makes it all worthwhile. So make life a garden for everyday and gather your rosebuds while you may.
                                                                                                          - P. MacDonald

Gratitude

I'm not strong enough to love you nor to let you go. I love you more than i have ever loved anyone yet i fear us more than i love you. I can't live with you nor can i live without you. I guess ill forever be stuck in the middle of fear and desire.

Love

*I thought you will be there
I thought you really cared
I thought you will never do this to me
How really can you unhear? 💔
What's going on in your mind ?
I really got some time
What I really did?
What really was my crime?...💔🥀*

Breakup

I know it won’t be difficult for you,
If i am not there
I know you don’t love me in that way
I am easy to forget 
Once you said world cannot be same without you,
Eventually ,I didn’t see the truth

I know you will move on
Leaving behind the memories

I know it won't be difficult for you
You will forget it so easily

You are my beautiful truth
I  am your saddest lie
You are the reason of my beating heart
I am not even the reason of your smile

Dear N,
From you, all I needed was a little effort, I was already yours. All you gave are those false hopes which always kept me tearing apart. And aching my heart. I wish if we didnt have started a conversation on those topics. I wish if you didnt ask me anything. I was already fallen for you, and I couldn't help it. I was desperate for you because I've been waiting for you for several years. Once you were everything that I needed. But, today I doubt. You told me that I shouldn't think that you dont want me but I dont see any effort from you so I can't believe that you want me too... All I see is words and no actions... It seems like we can't be something that we are looking forward to. I can't believe it unless you show up. 
Please come and hug me. I can't take it anymore. 
I think I love you but I know you can't digest this(I don't what that even feels like). And I can't afford to lose you so I can't even say it. 

I met you in the dark, you lit me up
You made me feel as though I was enough
We danced the night away, we drank too much
I held your hair back when
You were throwing up
.
Then you smiled over your shoulder
For a minute, I was stone-cold sober
I pulled you closer to my chest
And you asked me to stay over
I said, I already told ya
I think that you should get some rest
.
I knew I loved you then
But you'd never know
'Cause I played it cool when I was scared of letting go🥺



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